There is this uncle of mine who is known to be hot-tempered. My siblings and I grew up knowing him as someone who loves to fight. He doesn't know how to exchange words during arguments, he would rather use blows to explain himself and whenever a situation like that starts, my mom gets to cry a lot seeing her brother getting out of control again. She's used to him but she still finds it hard to control her emotions when her brother starts fighting. As I said, we grew up to meet him, which means he's a very grown-up man, with just a few years below my mom in age.
A few years ago, we traveled home for the Christmas holiday and he came around like he usually does. I was inside my room at around 9pm when I heard chaotic shouts from the outside, I quickly rushed out and behold, my mom was holding him very tight already begging him not to fight the person who provoked him. People had gathered already because our compound then was at the roadside. A deep anger erupted from my heart, I hated the scene of him causing the troubles again. I didn't know when I picked up a piece of firewood and challenged my mom to free him so that I'll wipe him with the wood, with my words warning him in anger,
"Must you always fight whenever you visit?"
"Must people always gather in our compound to separate you from a fight whenever you come?"
I was really very angry and wanted to end his fighting streak in the compound, anytime he visits. My mom saw how desperate I was to use the wood on him, she began to raise an alarm and people gathered the more to remedy the scene. Meanwhile, my uncle was even more "mad" that I wanted to fight him.
"This boy of yesterday wants to fight me!" He kept saying this word till he disappeared from the scene.
Do you know what?
It's not like he stopped being hot-tempered but for sure, he began to see me differently ever since that day. Up till today, he hasn't made any move to fight in the compound.
I love peace, no doubt about that. I don't like war or fighting, but sometimes I think the remedy to control someone with a hot temper is to challenge them by possibly giving them their own "shit to eat". I know this sounds like preaching war as a way to bring peace but in this case in particular, these people need to be matched up before they can calm down.
Maybe counseling works but from what I've experienced, a match-up is the easiest. Although it may cause damage during the process, the result always speaks. Until this set of people sees what is bigger than them, the anger emotion in them won't die down easily.
Sounds like a terrible solution, right? This is my opinion.
Thanks for reading.