Greetings!
In the hood where I grew up, old age is considered a blessing and a big flex. In fact, there are some families that are renowned for their longevity, and my family is among them. We take pride in this gift. In our community, the king is chosen as the eldest man, while the queen is selected as the eldest woman. With this in mind, the value and care given to the elderly are not taken lightly. Only a few families fail to give adequate attention to the elderly in their households.
Do I support old people being taken to retirement homes?
No way!
I prefer them to stay at home with their family members. Why do I say so?
Although I haven't directly experienced what happens in retirement homes for the elderly, I have encountered situations where caregivers were hired to look after the elderly, and the outcomes were not satisfactory. I’ve also seen portrayals in movies. Some non-Nigerians reading this might argue that hiring someone to care for the elderly or sending them to retirement homes isn't necessarily a bad idea, given how well-organized these systems are in their countries. Am I criticizing my country? Not at all—I’m just stating the reality.
Apart from the feeding and basic care that elderly individuals are likely to receive in retirement homes, the aspect of genuine family bonding will be missing. These are people(elderly ones) who have spent many years mingling with their loved ones. Being separated from their families, especially their children, could be quite challenging for them, even if they eventually adapt to life in a retirement home.
I would much prefer that the elderly stay at home—either living with their children in the same house or remaining in their own home, with a family member staying with them. This arrangement, which is common in my hood, helps maintain a strong connection to family and home.
My most recent interaction with an elderly person gave me a deeper understanding of how much these individuals cherish being surrounded by family.
We had one, now late, who was not directly related to my dad but was a member of our large extended family. He came down to the village to spend his old age after living in Lagos. His house was close to ours, and due to the family connection, we automatically became his children, taking care of him. He was very elderly and walked with a walking stick. Mehn, you wouldn’t believe how "disturbing" he was at times. We didn’t see it as a burden, though, because he considered us his close family.
He didn’t like watching TV alone, so whenever there was power or he turned on his generator, he would call me or one of my siblings to keep him company or send the little children to join him in watching TV.
I often wonder if this kind of warmth and connection could ever be found in a retirement home.
You see, elderly people come with all sorts of outrageous demands, and sometimes I think that hired staff in retirement homes wouldn’t be able to provide the unconditional love and understanding that family members offer.
Thanks for reading.
This is my entry to the Week 144, Edition 02 of the Weekly Featured contest in Hive Learners Community
Images used are mine