Training my kids to stand on their feet.

Parents have different methodologies of training their kids, and in one way or another, the decision of the parents has a big role to play in shaping the life of the kid.

My experience with my father since I was old enough to retain memories till the time of his death when I was 25 years old was amazing. He practicalized to me what true love between father and son looks like. My dad was ready at any time to sacrifice his comfort for his children. He could go to any length to make us happy. However, he trained us to be independent as much as he could. This kind of training that I received from him helped me tremendously when he died. I was able to navigate that chapter of my life with what I learned from him.

In the same vein, I am ready to pamper my kids and give them the best life as a father, but I will like to be a guardian. I will like to guide my kids early enough in their lives to be able to stand on their own.

When I was in the university, I saw some students in their teenage or early 20s riding cars, and not all of them could handle such a luxury properly with the academic demands.

I have vowed not to, however rich I am, buy a car for my kid before graduating from the university. Whatever may affect the education of my kids negatively won't be welcomed. I will allow my kids to have a taste of how it is to work for money. After graduating from school, instead of buying cars or other properties for them directly, I will give them a substantial part of the money to invest and use the profit to build themselves. If the business fails, I will go to their rescue. However, they might have learned what it takes to run a business and fail. Whatever lesson that comes with it is invaluable. This is how I want to train my kids.

A few years ago, I taught two siblings whose parents were very rich. We were discussing on a fateful day, and from our conversation, I realized that the kids were far from the reality of what the majority of Nigerians are going through economically. These kids don't know what it feels like to be in abject poverty, homeless, or hungry. All their lives, they had remained in the city. Their parents never took them to the village to mingle with the less privileged and know what life in those areas looks like. If this kind of kid becomes a leader tomorrow, he may find it difficult to connect with people's plights. It's happening a lot in Nigeria.

What I am saying in essence is that I won't seclude my children from what is happening in the street, even if I am a multibillionaire. I will allow my kids to face some obstacles and only guide them to navigate through the process. I will give them close monitoring and help them out when the need arises.

Among many other reasons for doing this is the reality that death is inevitable and it comes unexpectedly. If I don't train them to stand on their own early enough, what if I die while they depend wholly on me? We don't pray to die young, but then it's not within our control.

I want to set my kids on the parts of independence and greatness early in life.