It is medicine after death to come out to the public with a video, apologizing after one must have been robbed with the mud of scandal. For me, if the accuser accepts in a video to have acted foolishly of greedily or for whatever reason, he or she just gave me a nudge to seek redress legally.
Most times, people may propose forgiveness on scandalous issues but the consequences the victims had suffered before the culprits publicly apologises. But for me, I think the culprits should pay for the damages caused.
Looking at the time we live in, you will see that shame is not a big thing anymore. Peole seem to flare there muscle even in the face of things that should cause them shame. This is not to say there are no people who cover their faces in shame when the need arises. As such, when you are caused to experience such gly experience, the culprits should not go unpunished.
It takes grace to keep quiet when one is rubbed in the dirt of scandal even when an apology in video have been publicized.
Some years ago, the popular pastor of the Deeper Life Bible Church, Pastor W.F Kumuyi went to a church programme in the United Kingdom and naked ladies were planted to bombard him in his hotel room but his late wife appeared in the door and the plan was thwarted. Their intentions was to blackmail him through the scandal that he was with whores.
Also, there was also the Otobo scandalous act against Apostle Johnson Suleiman. She accused the clergyman to be engaged in sexual activities with her that led to pregnancy abortions. After a while, she owned up to the accusations to been sponsored by the enemies of the innocent clergyman. This has been the trend and there have been no reward for the blackmailer.
Recently, Senator Natasha Uduaghan accused the senate president, Senator Godswill Akpabio of sexual harassment only to back down after going to the internation front to solidify her claim now coming to tender an apology.
Scandalous acts in our time have greatly improved and little or nothing is being done to put a stop to it. The recent scandalous activities of #VeryDarkMan is something that has to be looked into by the Nigerian populace. There is also the need to check the blackmailing activities by scammers with the aim of swindling the unsuspecting public of their hard earned money.
Scandals could come through even the closest relatives to you. This is why I advocate that you keep private matters private because once your private matters, or images or videos are shared with another person, no matter who the person may be, you may become a victim of scandal.
It is enough to set boundaries with other people such that their are personal bio-data that they are not aware of or given to others. Setting boundaries helps us make our stand on certain issues clear to others. Hence, when anyone causes harm, it is good to make them know that their apology is not excusable after the harm has been caused already. This would also make us litigate any scandalous act against us. I believe strongly that until we bring to book one or two actors of scandalous activities, others may not learn to steer clear from our private matters.
It is fine to face challenges around scandal but while that could destroy one's personal image and hard work over the period, it is important to process before responding to whoever has decided to blackmail you through scandal. One should however not feel pressured to forgive or engage with the person before you are ready.
It is necessary to communicate openly with whomever that has abused your rights. The discussion should be done openly and your feelings about the consequences about their actions must be expressed in clear terms with steps to prevent future occurrence.
At such times, one can seek support from friends, family and professional counsellor or even a litigator who can counsel you on how to manage the situation. This will help you navigate the matter is a healthy way.
Forgiveness is a personal phenomenon that can be adopted but may not be appropriate in all circumstances especially when the root cause has of such scandalous act have not been discussed.