Today was one of those days where I got reminded that as a human being, I can make plans for how I want my day to go, but for my plans to actually go the way I've planned it, that takes a little bit of grace and favor from the big man up there.
Recently, my life has been a series of repeated events. I hardly do something new so I already know how my tomorrow would look like even before it gets to tomorrow. And for some reason I'm happy with that lifestyle (at least for now), because knowing what's going to happen next makes me feel in charge of my life and all that.
So when I woke up this morning, I already knew what I would be doing. The first thing on my list was to participate on my hostel's clean up, which I did with no stress, so that was ticked off my to-do list.
photo by Glenn Carstens-Peters
The second thing on my lists that morning was to go play football with the boys because we do this thing where we always go to play football after the clean up, but today, just as we were rounding up with the clean up, our electricity was restored and everyone ran into their rooms to either go charge their phones or to go see a movie.
So football was automatically canceled because the rest of us who didn't go in weren't enough to play by ourselves. So I went inside and got ready for the third thing on my lists of things to do for the day.
This third thing was probably my most favorite thing to do, as it concerns eating. Every Saturday, I tend to buy food from this lady who sells food in a wheelbarrow and pushes it around. So I sat down and waited for this lady to walk past with her barrow but to my greatest surprise and disappointment, she didn't.
She probably must have had her reasons for not showing up but whatever it was, I'm sure it wouldn't be enough to calm my anger that afternoon.. Yes, that afternoon, because I had waited for her all through the morning until about 1pm in the afternoon, that was when I realized that she really wasn't going to show.
But funny enough, none of those disappointments compared to the last one. You see I had made plans with someone really close to my heart. I had asked them if I could spend the whole of today (and a sleepover) at their place and although they didn't give me a straight answer, they didn't say no either.
They had said that they would get back to me with a reply and my dumb head had taken that as a yes. So when I picked up my phone to call them later this afternoon after finally getting something to eat, my heart had broken into a thousand pieces when they turned down my request.
Although they had given me a good reason why they had to say no, it wasn't enough to amend my broken heart. And that was it, all of my plans shattered into pieces.
So much for making plans.