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Being hot-tempered is something nobody wants for themselves. I used to be very hot-tempered when I was growing up, and I always show my emotions. My mother sometimes tells me about it and says I should really work on my anger. Just today, a friend told me that my sack of vexing is very small, and I honestly don’t know what she meant by that because we haven’t had a long conversation. I just thought to myself that if she had known me before now, she might have seen serious progress in my temperament.
I see a huge win when I can look back and see serious progress in how I have handled my temperament during the years. It takes a lot of intentionality and serious work, and I'm genuinely proud of my progress so far.
Being angry is a bad habit, and everybody knows that, in advanced countries, people go on anger management therapies where a shrink helps them by teaching them how to manage their anger.
What I have learned to manage my anger is to remain still and quiet when I am upset. I will get angry, but I will usually not react to the anger aside from showing emotions. By staying quiet rather than reacting immediately, it gives me time to think through my reaction to any situation. By staying quiet it prevent myself from saying words that will hurt the other person. Words, they say, are as sharp as a two-edged sword. When spoken, the words pierce the heart of the person to whom the words are spoken, which may demoralise the person and may scar them for life. Saying sorry later may not remove the pain that was caused.
It is not an excuse for something to stand on; being quick-tempered is manageable, and it is only bad when the person does not manage their temper. The key to temperament is learning to be calm in the midst of chaos, not allowing your emotions to get the best of you. Always understand that your tongue is as sharp as a sword and could do great harm to a person, just as a sword. People with temperament issues should understand that being angry is human; it is only wrong when we hurt the other person because we are quick to respond to our emotions.
I will complain to you about the things that upset me. It is when you don't see my complaints as valid that I will find a reason to escalate. We are wired differently and because of that, it is okay to understand the other person to live happily with them, when you know that the next person is quick to anger, you should try to accommodate the person by not doing things that triggers them, the problem sometimes is that people are usually selfish with their emotions and will only do what pleases them, even when it is clearly seen that the other person is being hurt or offended by their actions and inactions.
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