Setting Goals
Recently I joined the SlothySavers group. The idea is that people set a goal and work week by week to achieve that goal. Indeed, even the Hive Learners tells new members to set a goal and work towards it. The idea is simple: If people have a goal they will often work to achieve it. However, it always surprises me when people think they have failed if they don't achieve their goal.
It doesn't matter whether the goal is one Hive or in real life people often put pressure on themselves to reach their goals without taking a step back and think about why they set that goal in the first place.
Looking at a personal example.
If you have read my Actifit posts you know that I recently came back from 10 weeks away in the Philippines and Indonesia. People ask how my vacation went but I think about it and honestly, it wasn't so much a vacation but rather a "Fat Camp". My goal was not to have fun but to give myself a structured environment in which I would be motivated to lose weight and exercise regularly.
However, did it work?
For the first few weeks? Absolutely.
When I was staying at the Fairfield Inn in Surabaya life got really easy. I woke up in the morning to a buffet breakfast which was my only meal of the day. I loaded up on protein and complex carbohydrates so I would be full for the day. After that it was time to go to the gym and work out hard. Then add in time reading my Bible. Spend time working on Hive. Watch some anime and repeat.
After five weeks I lost 10 lbs
Then my wife came, then I started moving hotels, then I travelled to my parents remote village in Maddarulug and things broke down. Over the next 5 weeks I lost only one more pound. The willpower was used up, the routine was broken and bad habits reappeared.
It is a very common problem
I'm going to say that what happened to me is very common. People have good intentions which last for a while and then something derails them and they end up not reaching their endpoint. However, how people react to that failure is important.
I'd reckon that there are three possible reactions to failure.
First: Apathy
Second: Recognition and realignment
Third: Feeling bad / Failure.
Some people fail and legitimately don't care. I didn't reach my goal. Oh well, maybe next time. Not the best plan because if it doesn't prompt any hard decisions, soul searching or change in lifestyle the "Goal" is more of a "Dream". It becomes wishful thinking that people pay lip service to but don't actually have the ambition to complete.
Some people feel like failures or worthless. They look at how they had a goal and just couldn't do it. They weren't smart enough. They didn't try hard enough. They didn't have the tools or abilities needed for success. They accept defeat and feel miserable because something they really wanted to do they simply can't.
Neither of those first two options is useful. One is apathy which keeps someone from getting where they really want to go. One is defeat where the person gives up trying to go where they want to go.
For myself? I choose self reflection and learning from the loss. Once I learn what went wrong I can pick up the pieces, try to get rid of the stumbling block and try again. To me I think of WD-40. You may know that WD-40 is a penetrating oil which allows you to dislodge rusted metal pieces. Very useful stuff. The "40" in the name simply lets you know it is the 40th version of the Water displacement (WD) oil. Someone know what they wanted and tried over and over until they made the one that worked.
My losing weight and getting in shape routine is much like that. I've lost weight and gotten in shape many times before only have things go awry later. I know my body can get fit and I know many things that work and many more that don't All going well one-day I'll be able to get in shape and join a martial art training program. I haven't given up and I haven't fallen into despair.
I don't like giving up and I do like having direction
At the end of the day I know where I want to be and what I want to do there. If I don't follow a path that leads me there those wants are nothing more than pipe dreams. Or on the other side if I get despondent over not getting as far and as fast as I wish then discouragement will find and I'll think my goals are out of reach.
Well, I refuse to give in to apathy or despair. I live with hope and discernment. I hope and strive for a better me that it fit and strong. I refuse to let that dream die because of lack of action. I also refuse to let myself wallow in pity when things go wrong. It isn't how many times I fail, its that I keep trying even when I do fail.
That's my take on things. Perhaps yours is different and I would love to get a comment on why you think my viewpoint is flawed, or maybe give your own viewpoint so I can work it into my system;) Either way, thanks for reading, I always appreciate eyes on my content.