There is an old saying:

The cream always rises to the top.

Which more or less means that the best always rise above the rest. It may not be true in all circumstances but for myself and, to a degree, my children it has proven a reliable saying. I succeeded even though I had the worst schooling. My kids succeeded even though they "left" the best schools.

In my case I did not go to the best schools or get the best education. I went from school to school to school when I was young. If I remember correctly, 9 different schools by the time I was in Grade 8. I'm pretty sure some of those schools were less than stellar. Move to my high school and it was absolutely NOT one of the better schools in the area. My mom looked at the private schools, the Christian school and the schools that had International Baccalaureate (IB) program when she knew my academic potential. However, those "better" schools were too expensive, too far, or both.

When I graduated top of my class in Grade 12 and had some scholarship money, my parents pushed me very hard to go to a private Christian University. Trinity Western University. I finally got the step up in education that I always wanted: except maybe it wasn't. Please don't misunderstand me, I really enjoyed the school. The grounds were beautiful. The staff had great credentials, good educators, and small class sizes. The facilities were adequate depending on facility. The overall feel of the University was a bit like family. A very rich family.

Private School

I did very well at Trinity Western University until I ran out of money in my second year. Without money to continue? My university days were over until I had more cash. For two years I worked a minimum wage job and learned a very important lesson: If I didn't find something different I would never have enough money to support my dream of having a wife and children. If I didn't break out of the wage working trap I would never have the time to find another job. I applied to go back to University, but this time went to the University of British Columbia aka UBC.

Public School

UBC is a world class university and for local students the price to go there was about 80% cheaper than Trinity Western University. That's a huge difference for a struggling student! It is also a huge university with a student population larger than many Canadian towns. It is easy to just become a number, a faceless no-one to other students and professors. If you struggle academically? That's on you. Don't show up to classes? No-one cares. If you thrive with extra help you are just out of luck.

Here is the thing though.

Both Universities are excellent for very different students. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I went straight to UBC after high school? Would I have done so much better because I would have had enough money to continue without losing 2 years of my life working minimum wage? Or would I have been emotionally and socially immature and got left behind? I'll never know for sure and perhaps it could have gone either way?

I like to think I would have survived and thrived though. I never attended the “choice” schools in my academic career and I never got the one on one superior mentorship that some schools claim. I had competent teachers with average resources and that was enough for me to survive and thrive. Not all students are like me though. I was a very independent learner and probably would have been just fine if you gave me a curriculum, a library, and exams every now and then. Other students learn in a very different way. Some need the challenge of an IB program. Some need the smaller class sizes and mentorship or a faith based school. Others take full advantage of the social climbing structure of the “elite” schools

Private schools are often about money and marketing

Many schools market to parents fears and anxieties. Or play on the emotional question "Don't you want the best for your child"? Public schools are rarely thought of as the "best" option. Public funding and forced attendance often mean there are limited resources for children who may or may not want to be there. Parents typically want the best for their children and are often willing to “pay extra” to give their children the “best chance”. I don't blame them at all. The world is a scary and competitive place. I admit that I put my children in a private school when they were young because I honestly wanted to give them the best start.

My children didn't finish in the private school system though. When they were young? I had no issues with private school. Smaller class sizes? Huge. Making sure that those children who were not grasping the fundamentals got the foundation right? Huge. The biggest thing the private school did though was enforce that parents had a huge role also! Together we taught the children when they were young and impressionable to give them a solid basis so that when they got older they weren't left behind and could find their own path. My children both moved to public school as they matured.

I kind of looked at it like a greenhouse. If you put the young seedlings into a greenhouse they are more likely to get a little headstart on growing and evolve into a mature plant rather than failing with the first frost that comes around. However, if you protect the plant from everything they don't develop strong roots and resiliency. At some point the seedling needs to get into the real world to take root, become stronger and thrive. Sure it was a shock when my kids went to public school. I vividly remember my son wanting a top tier laptop to take to his private school. He took the same laptop to public school and immediately thought it was a bad idea. Why? Wealth made him stand out. At private school everyone had money/ At public school? Not as much. He learned an incredibly valuable lesson in diversity and wealth disparity in just one day.

Forgetting fit and the end goal

A big problem is when school marketing, parenting demands, or even peer pressure draw focus and money from the real goal of education. Education is to help the student to learn and figure out what they want to do with their life and give skills for future learning and enrichment. Private schools market better education to better jobs and more money. However, not every student is cut out to be a Doctor, Engineer, or Physicist. Some students are better suited to be technical, physical, service or other jobs. Setting unrealistic or misaligned goals can be disheartening. Parents often want their children to be “successful” without realizing that success for their child may not be what the parents want. I want my children to have a life of love and happiness far more than wealth...but its not my life to dictate. Sometimes the students buy into the educators goals of perfection and good grades and feel disappointed when they aren't “the best” or get the highest grades. I know a little secret....the best grades don't make the best workers or the best professionals. Yes. I got some of the highest grades in my Pharmacy class but I've met many highly competent professionals with far more average grades. Perhaps answer this question: Do you want the smartest Doctor? Or a competent doctor who listens and cares?

Competition has a place but...

When Hive Learners asked about competition in schools? Competition to get into the best school. Competition to get into the best program. Competition to be the best student. That competition causes people to focus on the wrong thing. Do you want the most prestigious shoes or shoes that help you walk? Do you want the most expensive school or the one that helps you learn? Do you want the program that gives the student the most lucrative career or the one that they will enjoy?

Some programs have an incredible physical or mental demand. When my son said he wanted to be a Doctor I kind of thought he was nuts. Did he really understand how demanding the program was? Some programs from Medicine to Arts to Athletics require only the best and competition there makes sense. I agree that you need to raise the bar high so that only those very special individuals who can actually succeed get into the program. However, for most other things where it isn't quite as demanding I would push hard for stopping the competition and focus on the education. Find the right fit, not the glamorous one. Although from personal experience, having a friendly rival (here's looking at you Mike) can push someone to do that little extra effort.

In short

Give kids the skills they need to learn. Place them in a school that is a good fit to help them. If that is an arts school? Great. Public school? Great. Private school? Sure. Military school or Boarding school? Well, there are many types of children. Children are incredibly diverse. There is no best shoe that will fit all their feet, and there is no "best" education that is good for all of them. Pursuing the silly notion of prestige and rank? Better to focus on where the child can learn.

That's my take on the Hive Learner prompt on competition for education. Thanks for reading this far and I always love comments if you feel like dropping a line.

....and final thought? I'd rather my son's be happy, capable adults than ones who have degrees from the best schools.