The act of passing down pain to another person is something I try my best to avoid. I don't like anything about it, and I think it can't be justified in any way. If the pain was caused back to the person who started it as an act of revenge, then it might be justifiable. Transferring aggression is one of the dumbest things I know to exist on earth.
Sometimes, some people say they do it out of anger, and sometimes it's true, but I still don't believe it justifies it. Because no matter the pain or anger, it is absolutely wrong to hurt someone innocent because you got hurt.
Doing it unknowingly or out of anger is wrong, and at least people who do this usually accept they are wrong when they come back to their right senses and try to make things right.
But as for those people who see it as normal and justifiable and do this act in their right senses, they are just straight up evil because I don't see any difference between this and hurting an innocent person unprovoked. Some of them just use that hurt as an excuse to cover up their wicked intentions.
Passing trauma from past experiences to people around someone just feels so unnecessary.
And when it comes to forgiving these acts, I think it can actually help because it feels like unforgiveness is one of the things that keeps this circle of pain going.
If they forgave the past from the start and let go of the past pain there wouldn't be any trauma being passed down. The secret to breaking this circle of pain is by overcoming past trauma, and forgiveness is the first step in doing so.
But this doesn't mean one shouldn't be held accountable for it.
Sometimes when I get hurt I can't keep it in, and it becomes so obvious because it shows in my attitude. And to be honest, sometimes I end up hurting people around me because my mood affects them too, like how I don't find anything funny and can't take a joke, or how my replies can be rude. Sometimes it makes people around sad or even angry, too, and I feel so guilty after spoiling someone's mood.
And I understand because it happens to me too. If someone around me, like a friend with whom I am close, is angry or sad, and no matter how I try, the person can't change, I just let the person be and stay away because it's just a matter of time before I become angry like the person I am trying to make happy.
And it's the same thing I do when the case is reversed. I isolate myself so as not to infect the happy people around me.
I know of a guy who scams people and delights in it. But this same guy cries like a baby when scammed, even the littlest one-tenth of what he steals from others. And then use his pain to justify the pain he causes other people.
I remember he was talking with my brother, and I told him his pain didn't make the wrong he was doing any better, and he told me that he didn't care. That's what they did to him, and that's what he is doing to others. And when I told him that if everyone was like that, it would never stop, and he literally answered, and I quote, “The circle would never stop then."
And after that day, I just ruled him out to be an evil person by choice.
I stand by my word. Pain isn't meant to be passed! Instead, we should learn how to end it!
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