Hi everyone! I’m so happy you’re here and reading my blog 🤗 It’s been quite a busy start of July, right? At least on my end, my introverted self braced meeting new people last June 30.
I’ve been recuperating since and my Wednesday Walks definitely helped me, especially since my mind’s doing mental gymnastics these days.
Here's why and I’ll try to simplify it with just a few words, but trust me, there’s a lot going on the background: I haven’t seen my dog, Timber, no more than five times since last year. It’s not like there’s a huge distance between us or my work doesn’t permit me, but deeper psychological wounds persist when I try to visit him.
As some of you may know, I am in no-contact with most of my family members (and now you know HAHAHA.) Unfortunately, sneaking in to see Timber damages me psychological as if I’m reliving horrible memories that I don’t wish to remember 😔
I am no fit to see him anytime soon either, even though my whole body longs for my Rottweiler baby. To cope during this periodical depressive episode, something came over me, and just decided to walk it out. Perhaps going outside will help me get out of an emotional overwhelm, and just like clockwork, it did.
At first, I feel lazy to do it, but once I wear my headphones, look up at the sky, and my running shoes graze the sturdy ground, it all seems to make sense. I feel lighter each step and my mind can enjoy the music. I can pretend I’m a main character from a coming-of-age movie, slowly realizing that their youth is here. The moment is right now.
It makes me feel good about myself. No surprise behind the science of this. The American Psychological Association said walking lowered the risk of depression in adults (2022). Moreover, it reduces stress since it lowers our cortisol levels (stress hormone) and releases endorphins, which helps improve our mood (LOvila, 2022).
But what made one of my Wednesday Walks special was because of this stray dog. I’m thinking of naming her Mama Loafy because of her tan and baked bread colored fur. Unknowingly, I already took photos of her before I truly met her. I found her adorable basking in the sunset in the middle of the grassy field alone. She seemed to be peacefully content, resting without a care in the world, knowing she was the best mama dog in the world.
At the end of my walk, I saw her, laying on the field once again. My heart sank at the thought of Timber being on the field too. He would’ve enjoyed the smell of the grass and done some zoomies like all happy dogs would. I thought, I just wish to pet a dog, even if it’s not Timber, just any dog would do. So I called the attention of Mama Loafy, pursing my lips and making “tssu” "tssu” sounds. Surprisingly, she stood up from her laying down pose and came up to me.
I made sure she was friendly by placing my hands closer to her snout, which she gladly sniffed. Identifying me as friend, she asked for love and affection. I was shocked, but quickly granted her request and petted her head. If there weren’t people present in the field too, I would’ve cried on the spot. There’s nothing heartbreaking for a dog mom like me more than not seeing my baby doggo. So I concluded Mama Loafy must have been a gift from the universe.
She kept me company for about 15 minutes. I sat on the field to watch with her the other dogs playing. Then she would ask for pets again and then we’d sit in silence. I said to myself, this is what dog heaven must look like. I felt like I was in my own paradise, the sun was setting to the left, the breeze was blowing my hair, and there’s a gentle creature beside me to bask in the nature scenery. While I can’t be with my Timber yet, this would have to do. Mama Loafy is a sign that I should continue my walks, so that I can be healthier, and when I reach a certain mental strength and healing, I would reunite with my dear Timber again. Maybe one day, he would join my walks and meet Mama Loafy. I’m sure Mama Loafy has a lot to say to Timber because I told her all about him.
Although some days are harder to get by than others, I’m not going to give up. It’s not just solely for me, but for my doggo, who I’m sure misses me as much as I miss him.
Do you have a dog too? Share their names and photos in the comment section below! 😊
Thank you so much for reading and supporting my blogs. I hope you find comfort in people like me, who are wounded but are determined to heal 💜
ᴬˡˡ ᵖʰᵒᵗᵒˢ ᵃʳᵉ ᵗᵃᵏᵉⁿ ᵇʸ ᵐᵉ ᵘⁿˡᵉˢˢ ˢᵗᵃᵗᵉᵈ ᵒᵗʰᵉʳʷⁱˢᵉ
