Always make your children your top priority in life.
My dad was a giver. With an open heart, he helped anyone in need, believing I scratch your back, you will scratch mine when needed .He’d fix families roofs, lend money, show up for strangers, even buy casket for those in needs in our village to the extent that he was recognised and known almost the price of casket then🙄. Me and my siblings used to laughed over that then.I watched, admiring his generosity, thinking it was the way. But life taught us a hard truth.
When storms hit him the script flipped.during our mother Ill health, and his retired ,tough times show a serious one,people he’d aided vanished. No calls, no help. It stung. The ones he thought would stand by him were all Gone. What remained? Us, his children. Just us.
The lesson wasn’t about bitterness, it was boundaries. Dad’s belief in mutual aid collided with reality. He didn’t teach me to stop giving but to be wise. Help others, yes. But anchor first to those who choose you. No ledger, no score. Just clarity.
I saw pain, sure. But also strength. Dad never stopped being kind, just guarded. He showed me loyalty isn’t earned by those you favors.We, his kids, learned to cherish the unspoken bond no transactions, just care.
Now, I give differently,I put my children and my siblings first not families.
Cos my Dad’s story is a caution, not a curse and
My mum had a quiet strength that shaped me. Her gentleness.You can't see her angry she might be hurt but all you will see is a smile. I saw her practice it. So it always piss me off, sometimes i get angry over it until the day she told us that words in anger are seeds you regret. Mum didn’t preach, she modeled. With dad’s frustrations, my sibling attitudes yet She’d listen, breathe, and smile . No shouting all you will see in her is a calm talk. But did not realised this until she was late and people where all talking over her calmness that instead of her to talk back she will just walk away.
