Somewhere in the unconscious...

Hello, dear community of creators...

In this opportunity i share another of my strange and magical creatures... sometimes iwould like to know their origin, what they mean, i only know that they are born and formed somewhere hidden in my unconscious. I admit that it was a drawing i almost abandoned because at the time i was not in the right frame of mind to appreciate it. I had to rest and not look at it anymore... To contemplate it with different eyes.

This i think is my favorite part, after the sketch is as stylized as possible, comes the part of inking, outlining and adding maybe some extra details. This moment is usually relaxing, i could call it my comfort zone when drawing. The first one is the traditional one done with ink but the second one is digital, because initially I had made the decision that i would not do it traditional but a digital illustration...but everything changed, i got terribly frustrated in the next steps, when color knocked on my door. I have a bit of a toxic relationship with color, and I don't know why.

I don't remember at what point of this drawing began my despair of not knowing what to do with it.... I'm used to that when it comes to put color to what i do, i start a kind of moment of frustration because i don't know why i have a strange relationship with colors, i love them but when i'm going to use them something paralyzes me then i see everything distorted and i can hate the drawing even when others see it very nice. On the other hand as i mentioned before, after i had that conflict with color, i wanted to do it in digital, because i love how it looks in vectors... but i think that after that frustration i had, i started to sabotage my digital process... even though i liked how it was turning out, i stopped it too.

I had to pause what i was doing, the pause was longer than expected. I was really going to discard it completely because i had heard many times that if you already have many projects half done for a long time and you're kind of stuck with it, you better leave it like that and continue with another one. But honestly i didn't want to accept it, it usually happens to me often with all my drawings, so it's not something rare in me either. But this time the feeling was a bit more complex.

And i think it had a lot to do with the fact that lately i had to be doing more digital work, i could not spend much time with my traditional art and i have seen other cases in which many lose a lot of motivation and inspiration when this change occurs, the environment becomes a little heavy and everything in general. To be honest, i thought i had forgotten to draw. In the end, fortunately, i saw the light at the end of this tunnel.

Here a little video of the half process, because the first part i didn't record anything since it was a project i was going to discard but suddenly, while i was going through the folders of my laptop, organizing things, deleting pictures... I found the first pictures of this drawing and i was looking at it with different eyes and that was my mistake, i wasn't appreciating it with the right eyes... Then i continued during my favorite hours to draw, 1 to 3 am and it was very fast and fluid.

I liked the result of this mystical creature from some strange forest, or maybe a feathered mermaid... its strange and colorful head reminds me of some giant parrots in my country with those multicolored feathers.

What does it mean? I don't know... somewhere in my unconscious will be the answer.

And i think this is all for now, i hope in the next drawing my mind will not sabotage my creative process again. 😆