The image above is the photo of one of my paintings. It is entitled "Raw Thoughts" and it is a 12" x 16" acrylic on wood.
As we age, we tell ourselves that we should wear our scars with pride, without understanding that this type of badges weights more towards the past and leaves little space for the future. The more we try to protect ourselves from being hurt, tendency we developed as a self-preservation instinct, the lesser we are opened to new opportunities.
Our judgement bears the weight of our wounds and is more likely inclined to project sombrer outcomes, unleashing the offsprings of our fears. As we label everything around while playing a selfless act, 'with no subjectivity whatsoever', we succombe to our ego which becomes the narrator of our faith.
We see ourselves as warriors of our paths and like to believe that we are the product of the sum of experiences we have been through, that no one has ever gone through the same shit as we did, that our past pains or dramas we've lived justify our current behaviour. Not only that they have shaped our past and present behaviour, but also influence the future decisions, leaving little to no room to chance or hope.
Are we really entitled to judge others or predict their future acts based on our sole past experiences? Isn't this depriving us from a chance to happiness? Are we really so blind to recognize that we are the ones that need to change?
There is always a choice and it is up to us to decide what colors we paint our world in. Not everything needs to be grey! Even the darkest tones and hues can get a touch of pink! Same as not everything goes in straight line. I know cause I've been zig-zagging and going in circles for quite some time!
It takes courage to be vulnerable and show your true self. It's an enriching experience that enables one to grow and nurture positivity. It builds enthousiasme and excitement for the things that really matter.
Before all that, it takes guts to wake up in the morning and make that choice which will write the script for the rest of your day. The moment you open your eyes while you are still in the sweet embrace of your bedsheets, you have to decide if you're going to make it or take it.
Are you willingly going to take the world's burden on your shoulders and struggle for things that are beyond your control? What will make you understand the futility of this act? What will get you satisfied? Better said, when would you know what makes you happy? Are you ever going to be in peace with yourself? If you continue to run from yourself, disaster will always strike, no matter where you'll be. Ask yourself what are you seeking: success, external validation, love, peace?!?
Being lost is okay. Staying lost is not. All suffering in life is temporary. It's the memory of pain that makes us second doubt our steps or decisions. Overanalyzing that fleeting thought extends its time, makes you dwell in misery. We all feel lost once in a way, but we cope with it. It's like stepping out from under a dark cloud. It's that simple: a single step in a new direction.
Once you realize you have more control than you think, everything will fall into place. Life will unravel itself in brighter colors and you will be out of the victim mindset. You will need to find your on way out of it, cause there is no one size fit all recipe for it. Is never too late to reevaluate some aspects of the person you are today, to decide who you want to be tomorrow.
check out my GALLEA online art gallery page HERE
or visit my website: lavipicu.com.
Lavi Picu is an interdisciplinary artist, currently residing in Montreal, Canada. She is an emerging visual artist who uses painting and poetry as alternative forms of self expression as well as pain management therapy for Lyme disease. She is also the author of four soulful collections of poetry.