This is my post for #freewriters 2593 prompt contradiction of lies hosted by
Being a mother has been the greatest gift life could give me. Each time when I first held my newborn babies I had no words to say how I felt. In the past, I have felt love and been in love but this love I now feel is the deepest love I have ever felt how can I love someone so much that in that instant I knew I would do anything for them I mean anything, even giving my own life for theirs?
Everything was great from toddler to later teen years, this is when things started to change, a contradiction of lies, things like spending the night with a friend, turned out to be they were at a party. I figured these were teenage things, I did this with my parents and they will straighten up when they get a little older.
Things did change for the better my son married and had a son, he had a good wife and job working on skyscrapers in NYC, but after a few years, they divorced. This is when I saw a change in him that I can not fix and it hurts me. The hardest thing I have had to do as a parent is to accept it is his life, he is an adult and he knows the dangers of drug use. I am not very good at accepting this, but I am trying.
The other one was working a good job, she was the manager of a big box store when she started having medical issues and had to quit, she stopped going to the DR and started self medicating with street drugs. She lives with me and yesterday she was very "active" she dressed in a tutu, jacket, glasses, and a belt wrapped around her head and spent 3 hours cleaning a clean bathroom. She will be awake for a few days and then sleep a few, but when she gets up she is angry at the world until she gets "active" again.
People think I should not allow this and I should throw her out. I can not and will not do this!!! The thought of her being like this on the streets kills me. If something happens to her, I want her here with me, not lying in the woods somewhere and no one finding her for days. I have Narcan here at home, they say it will bring her back. I pray I never need to use it.
photos are mine