Driving through the rain, my family in the car, kids talking about all the things they could be doing if only it were sunny, my wife adding to their conversation, the landscape rushes by and I begin thinking in a way that is part contemplation, part reflection.
How many times have canceled plans led to better things, I wonder. How many times have dull rainy days led to warm, long-lasting memories?
And then my mind drifts: weekends of playing cards on the screened-in porch of my friend’s lake cottage in the summer, the mist of splattering rain drifting onto my arms and onto the table, lightening streaking across the sky; standing on the end of a dock, fishing in the rain and enjoying it solely because doing it in the rain made it more fun for me as a child; stepping into a museum that I never would have visited because it was nearby and provided shelter; staying longer than I would have at a party and meeting someone special, someone who was lingering because of the rain; canceling a barbecue and staying home to watch movies and make puzzles with my kids, a bowl of popcorn on the table, everyone scooping large handfuls and smiling …
Continuing down the road, I ask myself, what is the best image to represent the idea of something being spoiled by the rain? And then I think of a picnic, and again my mind drifts back, across time and space, to a first-date that I had many years ago, a picnic date, sitting by a stream in a large open park, nervous, giggly, eating sandwiches and fruit, laughing.
And then I begin to compose:
rainy picnic day
our relationship made special
with disappointments
Hmmm … I think, this is the idea that I want to communicate, but … What if I change the second line to this:
rainy picnic day
our time together made special
with disappointments
No, that doesn’t work either. I have the idea, but I’m telling it. There is nothing special about this. I need an image. What is an image related to picnics that anyone would find disappointment in?
Soggy sandwiches. That could work. Has anyone ever been happy to pull a sandwich out of a plastic bag or its wrapper to find it soggy and gooey? I don’t think so.
rainy day picnic
the sandwiches soggy but
still you laugh and smile
Hmm … this is better, but … is it too long? Is it too conversational? What can I take away from it? How can I make the images stronger? What if I do this …
rainy day picnic
soggy sandwiches and
your smile
Ohh … I like that. But does it convey the idea that I began with?
(1)
rainy day picnic
soggy sandwiches and
your smile
(2)
how gloriously blue
even the palest shade of blue
after a week of rain
(3)
i felt an urge
to cover the poor leaf
with a blanket
(4)
passing you i wonder
would i hear the sea if i
put your ear to mine
(5)
a song we all know
a movement of air
a candle goes out
(6)
though i cannot
my heart it wanders
this lonesome road
(7)
a beer
a book
and myself
