I sit and ponder,
Where these thoughts come from,
Thoughts that continue to hold me back,
That strip me bare,
Opening me up to this fear,
that creeps upon me.
As I try, to loosen these feelings of desire,
Feelings coated heavily, with a lack of self worth,
Continuously, trying to shake them off
Because, I know that I am enough.
Yet, they always come creeping back,
Weighting so heavy upon my soul,
Feeding the doubts I hold within,
How I am too complicated,
Too worn out,
Not enough,
Are we ever enough
Chasing after these ideals,
That were spoon fed to me,
Since I was a child.
Ideals I stepped away from,
That I turned my back on,
And yet the self dread remains,
My fears crushing, the inner beauty that screams to be seen,
to be heard.
Cos I know better,
And I try, so hard to do better.
To reach that little girl within
To take her hand and tell her she is loved,
That she is perfectly, imperfect.
That real beauty, shines from within,
Yet still,
I stumble and fall.
