Before I go to the business of making you all laugh your asses out, there's been something really bothering me and it's not why my posts don't all get upvoted, no. It's rather more delicate, very very delicate.
I've been wondering, why do guys always place both hands in their pockets whenever they actually wear something nice? I've asked myself this question a thousand times and the answer just wouldn't come, maybe you can help me out in the comments? Would ya?
So, back to business, what I'm about to tell is something very sensitive, it happened to me some days back, just two days back and I've not been able to get over it since. Instead of keeping it in any longer I've decided to share it with y'all, yunno, a problem shared is spreads the virus faster and that brings about a faster solution.
I was having a pretty filled day, making videos and posting them on my tiktok, having a very good feminine waist dancing around my pelvis area and every thing was going perfectly well when a call came in. It was my friend reminding me of the birthday party she'd invited me to and wanted me to be there so badly.
Being at a dilemma, I took a deep breath, going meant loosing this dance around my pelvis and going also meant I might get the chance to get not one, but maybe as many a waist as possible on my pelvis. Since she was a lady there was every probability that she'll have a bunch of lady friends, that's like killing so many lady birds with one stone.
So I left pretty excited and it took me a while to get to the lounge where the party was supposed to be happening. I got there and there was nobody there yet, can you imagine that? I felt some of the excitement leave me as I dialed her number. She apologized that she was on her way that they needed to made sure candy was available before the party started, so she asked me to wait for a little while.
I did wait, but before long my stomach was singing symphonies and I wouldn't want anyone to hear that when the party started. So I strolled a little entered a provision shop and got myself a chilled bottle of Pepsi and some biscuits to drain out my belle singers. After downing the last sip, I could feel them tire out and sleep, exactly what I wanted.
Went back to the lounge, got my phone charging and started to vibe to the loud music. After a while I received a tap on my shoulder that almost sent me running in shock, I had been so lost in the sounds that emanated from the speakers and I had almost dreamt of a nice little waist on my pelvis, you know the perfect kind that I can wrap my arms around and...
Clears throat
Apparently this sudden joy killer was the birthday girl, so I stood up to hug her. I was surprised because she felt a lot more masculine than before and where the all the boobs go? Well, maybe she must have been working out, girls do that lately so I waved it aside. Then she introduced a perfectly stunning lady as babe, wow, she sure looked exactly like what I was fantasizing about but just a little bit slimmer.
She gave me a side hug to my dismay and they immediately dragged me to where the others sat. There were quite a few guys and a few girls there, more were on their way. So I sat opposite two girls I think, both of them were wearing a shirt and trousers which made them look masculine too but one really had a beautiful face so I smiled at her and avoided eye contact with the guys, they weren't why I was here.
After a while, two awkward looking dudes stepped in, they were dressed like guys but had this girly postures and way of walking but then maybe they were just guys who grew up amidst a lot of ladies, so it's natural. Immediately they sat down, the party began in ernest, everyone were given chug cups and their cups were filled with vodka and juice, a really cool mixture it you ask me.
I took a sip, it was nice then I kept on sipping. Then saw sticks being passed across each person, when it was close enough I immediately grabbed one only to realize it was a blunt (weed or arizona?, I had no idea), even if I didn't really smoke, I wasn't one to shy away from one. So I lit up and took a few puffs, yeah it felt good. My breathing steadied and everywhere because calm amidst the loud music.
Introductions started and every one started to say their names but i could swear I heard the MC say something about being open-minded, of course I was open minded. It finally got to the turn of those weird looking guys and the first one said his name was Vicky, and the other said "I'm candy" and everyone cheered. I couldn't seem to understand why they were cheering, all I needed was to dance and have a waist close by.
Party went on in earnest, guys were twerking, and girls were rocking each other but they didn't quite fit my taste yet but then, an envoy of girls came rushing in, it was getting dark and I couldn't see properly but I could tell they were wearing short gowns with slits and heavy make up but they were thick even if they had small boobs. Clearly impressed, I sipped on what left of the drink in my cup and puffed more of the blunt, I could feel myself floating but I was still in control.
I entered the dance floor with so much zest and started to show off my cool moves, I coul hear the cheers and it was great, it felt so good. Next thing I knew the girls were all over me, good God!, now this is what I was talking about. They danced around me and after a while, one waist turned towards my pelvis and started to dance so hard on it.
This should be the best moments of my day but there was a problem, this waist wasn't doing the trick for me, it felt stiff and hard, I can't even explain it, but I politely left that waist and moved over to the next one that was waiting for me. This one felt a lot better, this one had it in her and she was killing me.
I was already enjoying this dance so much and when I took my hands up to the boobies region, I felt bare chest, good gracious God, what lady grinds this good with no boobs? I couldn't quite place it, then I took my hands towards her face to have a look at how beautiful she was to compensate for no boobs but something rough welcomed me, it was beards!!!
I immediately felt sick, I could feel myself fall immediately from the clouds. A strong headache kicked in, was I actually thinking things? I looked around me for the first time since I joined the dance floor and then it dawned on me that I was at a fuckin homosexual party all along. All the ladies I saw walk in weren't ladies at all, all of them had beards, carried a feminine make up and wore gowns, and to think I was actually having a dude around my pelvis all along.
I couldn't believe it, I couldn't understand how a Cow could have been led for slaughter when he has eyes. I slowly walked over to where my friend stood dancing with her babe and said my goodbyes, then I went home. I couldn't say a word of it to my roommate because i wouldn't hear the end of it. I just slept and kept seeing .....argh.
Moral of the story, don't do drugs and if you're invited to a party be sure to ask if they'll be men wearing gowns at the party, you'll thank me later for sharing this one. If you have any one more embarrassing than this you can share it in the the COMedy Rumble contest. We'll love to have a good laugh 😂.
Thank you for reading this, if you enjoyed it or it connected to you in a way, I invite you to drop a comment I'll be glad to reply and Upvote for more content ❤️