Hello my fellow hivers, hope December met you all in good condition.
I am here to share my experience and challenges as a single mom of two children a male and a female.
Most people in the community where I grew up and even in most societies don't like seeing single mothers around them. Some speak ill of single mothers and disrespect them, saying all sorts of things against them. Some even go as far as to treat single mothers like trash.
Most ignoramus men will come around, wanting to take advantage of single mothers because they think that single mothers are "loose" and that no one would rise up in defense for them.
As for me, when I noticed the stigma trend, I stood my ground. I didn't allow anyone to disrespect me. I know my own story and only I know why I am a single mom today. I did not ask or wish for it but since that is the state where I found myself, then I must help myself to work hard and survive.
Being a single mother of two young adults is very complex but I need to say it the way it is with me,
My young adult children are not easy to deal with especially when they are away in the university studying. I work hard to provide for my children and be there for them as both mother and father figure.
Truth is, sending the children to school, clothing them, taking care of the children especially when they are sick or hungry or when they are been bullied at school and in the environment, is difficult.
Young adults are very difficult to deal with especially when they "think" that they are right when you as a mother knows that they are wrong.
Most times they fight themselves for minor things and quarrel. They even keep things away from themselves but later they will settle and come back together, without anyone mediating between them. It always gives me joy whenever I see them cooperating and living in love as siblings.
On this journey of single motherhood, there are times when I will be in serious pains, needing someone to talk to and share my pains with but then there is no one to talk to or cry out to and so I bottle my pains within me. Sometimes, I end up talking to myself in order to free my mind from some agony.
I have observed that most single father's walk freely in the community than single mothers. Is being a single mom a crime or did we ask for this situation?
I feel it is very painful and hurtful to be treated with disdain after sacrificing everything for the children to be okay, for them to be on par with other children in the community and for them to be able to hold their own. I cry anytime I witness children insulting their parents, stressing them and causing them heartache.
Single mother's go through lots of pains and heart break just to care for their children. It is even more painful when she cannot meet the children's needs at some points in life. Personally, when my children make requests for something and I cannot provide it as at when due, it makes my heart to be heavy and I cry secretly. My prayer is that my children will fulfill destiny and be great in life. That all my labour will not be wasted.
Thanks for reading till the end.
Images used are mine.