To start with I really don’t want much from God, I just want to be a mother that would be alive to take care of her children, not the one watching from heaven Nah, I want to be present in my childrens life, hear them make their first cry, first laugh, first move, first words and ultimately hear them call my name.
My mom was not fortunate to experience most of these things because she left this world too early, she died a day after giving birth to my younger brother and the few hours she spent were used in battling for her life, she was unable to see him grow, she wasn't able to even breastfeed him for an hour. This is certainly not the mother I want to be, I know she tried her best to be with us but God knows best.
I really don't know what it feels like having a mother in one's life as my dad did not remarry and the closest mother figure I had and still have is my Aunt who also has her family to deal with, if you’ve been keeping tabs on my posts you’ve probably seen a ton of posts where I talked about my Aunt Charlotte, yes she means a lot to me.
I want to be that parent that sticks around for a very long time, I was tokophobic years back as a result of my mum dying after childbirth and I even made a post about it here. I have been on a journey of realizing the amazing nature of motherhood, I have read, I have seen and practically asked all my friends who are mothers how it feels like and they only say beautiful things, I am so ready to go on that journey, the pains, the change in size, change in complexion, the hurdles, the responsibilities I am willing to gladly accept all of it.
I want to be a young mother, one whose age gap is not so wide from that of her children, I want to be responsible and loving, I want my children to respect me and not be afraid of me, let them be able to share even the tiniest details with me.
I want to be a financially independent mum, one who is able to support her children and husband financially, if my children need something I should be able to afford it instead of running around to get the money.
I want to instill morals in my children, no child of mine is allowed to be badly behaved, I want to be able to build my children’s confidence from a young age because this was what I struggled with while growing up, raising bold and confident children who will be able to defend themselves anywhere is my desire, you can’t be my child and be timid, NO fam! you must hold your head high!
A prayerful and godly parent is not off the list as I want to train my children in the way of the Lord, no child of mine is permitted to be wayward.
Above all I want to be a cool mum, that type of mum that my children would be proud of and be able to show off wherever they go and can fit in anywhere, a mother that my children will be able to beat their chest and say “that’s my mum right there!”.
I don’t want to give birth for another human being to take care of.
I want to play dress up with my little girls, wear matching outfits with my kids, guide them when they attain puberty, be there for my boys as well, give my kids proper sex education, go on shopping sprees with my babies, do homework and projects with my kids, attend PTA meetings and other school functions, watch my children walk down the aisles with the love of their lives and shed a few tears of how far I have come in life while raising them.
I am really not asking for too much, I just want to be a living parent and other secondary perks can follow, so help me God.
Thanks for stopping by
Loads of Love🥰🥰
XOXO
This is my entry to the weekly #motherhood challenge.