My son Jeff turned 18 years old last December 13. Jeff has autism, and he is non-verbal. As parents, we sometimes wonder if he understands things the way other kids do. We really don’t know if he knows what a birthday really means.
That day, we prepared a very simple celebration at home. We only had a few foods on the table and a cake with his name on it. Nothing grand. Just love.
When Jeff saw the food and the cake, something unexpected happened. He suddenly ran upstairs. We were confused. We looked at each other and asked, “Did we do something wrong?” We waited and wondered why he left.
After a few minutes, Jeff came back down. This time, he was wearing his newest shirt and pants. And then we saw it, a smile on his face. At that moment, my heart felt full. Maybe he knew. Maybe he understood that the day was special. Maybe he knew it was his birthday.
We invited a few kids from our neighborhood. They were very young, around 3 to 6 years old. When they started singing Happy Birthday, Jeff clapped his hands. He looked happy and excited. I lifted the cake, lit the candle, and helped Jeff blow it.
There was happiness in his eyes.
But something funny happened. Because the kids were very young, everyone wanted to blow out the candle. So I let them. I lit the candle again and again until every child had a turn. Jeff became excited and started having a small tantrum because the cake was right there, but the blowing took so long. Good thing he became calm when he finally got his first slice of cake.
Jeff would be in college today if he were in the mainstream. But I never feel bad about it. I accept him fully. I love him deeply.
Jeff is my joy, my strength, and my heart.
He will always be my Ausome Jeff.