Hello hivers,
As a young girl, I thought of becoming a mother and seeing myself having that perfect motherhood life. I didn't think that I would complain about a whole lot of things and sometimes wish that the phase of nurturing a child will just pass. I am certain a lot of parents are in my shoes and sometimes wish they could turn back the hands of time to when it was just them and their partner. Well, the gift of parenthood is still beautiful anyway.
Taking back the hands of time, I could picture myself living a very quiet life. I could stay indoors for a whole day and no one will ever know that I am at home. But all of that is gone now. You must hear me shouting and cautioning my child. "Don't go there, come here, stop that". These words seems to be my daily talk routine and hardly a day goes by without my child doing and going to places that are harmful for her. She is 10 months and still needs a lot of watching.
I miss my me-time a lot. The only time it seems like I spend some time for myself is of course when she is sleeping. And these days, it is as if she is out to punish me. She doesn't sleep more than 15 minutes during the day. She goes to bed as early as 6 pm and by 10pm she is up. That's when she starts her own day. You will hear her mumbling words and clapping her hands. We co-sleep so its difficult to get a good night rest that way. In fact, last night I almost ran out of the bedroom to the sitting room to sleep. I ended up begging and pleading with her to keep quiet. The more I tried to make her sleep by breastfeeding, the more agile she became. She did that till 4am this morning. I had no choice than sleep the same time she slept. Now this is the point where I would just send her to my mum so that I can rest well for some days(thinking aloud though).
I also miss my days of slaying. Okay so this is quite personal. I can't remember when last I stepped out with just my handbag and my phone. Ladies and gentlemen, my stepping out feels like I am travelling because my bag is always filled with baby food,diapers and baby clothes. And of course my little girl is always going out with me too.
One of the biggest thing that has changed about me is that I am more patient than before. Before now, I had no time to be patient with people. But ever since I gave birth, I just switched to becoming more patient and understanding with people. I noticed it when I ordered for some goods to sell some months ago. My customers knows very well that if you tell me that you will deliver today, you must deliver today because you said so with your mouth. I don't care if anything happened along the way. But now, I try to be very understanding with you and even give you time. My customer even pointed it to me and I just laughed over it.
As a mother being patient is a cloth that you must wear. Sometimes I just scream out load when my baby pisses me off. Before she eats, you must have sang and danced for her. I don't know why she does that. It is as if you need to appease her to eat. Actually her smile melts my heart. I think that's why I tend to do what she wants by the way.
I have also noticed that I am more selfless. Motherhood has taught me that it is no longer about me anymore. I am more considerate and tend to put people first and even think of them before I do anything. If you ask me, I think I appreciate my mum now because I now see the reason why she let's us eat first before she eats.
However, I wished I spent at least a year with my husband alone before having a child. Honestly, parenthood has changed us a lot that a lot of things we were doing before our child came, we have paused those things. For instance, we don't even go clubbing anymore. We can't spend quality time as we usually do in the early hours of the mornings talking about ourselves and our marriage. We are barely romantic with each other because of the stress that has come with parenthood. I am looking forward to when our child can walk well and can talk so that I will send her to my mum for a week. I need to have romantic time with my husband at least.
Wondering what's going on? Well, this is my reaction to #motherhood community contest. You can find details here to participate.
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