El señor Alberto, soló busca criticar a su nieto Alex de 20 años, e hijo mayor de Sofía quien tomó la dura pero firme decisión de parar los estudios universitarios de arquitectura faltando solo tres semestres para culminar su carrera y con un record de notas excelentes. Todo para poder ir a otro país a buscar un mejor porvenir para su familia, sobre todo por su hermanito de 7 años. Ya la crisis golpeaba con fuerza en Venezuela.
Suena como muy descabellado e injusto pero antes de emitir un veredicto y juzgar, hay que conocer y entender el trasfondo de cada historia venezolana marcada por la triste experiencia de la migración.
Lo cierto es que el señor Alberto solo hace acto de presencia en casa de Sofía, su única hija, para criticar todo pensamiento y hecho que no provenga de él. Esto es fácil para quien es muy controlador de las vidas de todas las personas, pero muy difícil para quien lo sufre, como el caso de Sofía y sus hijos, todos aspergers o autistas leves, que les ha tocado sobrevivir no solo en la sociedad sino en el propio seno familiar y más bajo la tiranía del señor Alberto.
Sofía da gracias a Dios porque su hijo Alex si pudo escapar... no solo de la crisis venezolana.
Luego que termina su visita el señor Alberto, se va con la misma descortesía con que llega. No pierde oportunidad de demostrar su desprecio por la hija y los únicos nietos que le tocó. Para Alberto es inaceptable e imperdonable que sean de una condición que el nunca entendió ni lo hará. Por eso la vergüenza y el rechazo hacia ellos.
Por fin, un poco más relajada, respira Sofía en lo que su padre se marcha. Siempre sus encuentros e incluso conversaciones telefónicas son muy incomodas. Sofía, una mujer de 50 años, siempre ha aguantado mucho abuso emocional por ser como es, una persona introvertida y noble. Eso le ha costado el desconocimiento de la felicidad, con una infancia y adolescencia gris, lo que le garantizó una adultez opaca, con falsos destellos de luz y color que de vez en cuando le permiten un obligado, fingido y breve brillo.
En fin, ya sola en su casa Sofía se pone a meditar en lo que su padre dijo: “Ya Alex se hubiera graduado”.
Ella indignada arma en su mente lo que pudiera decirle a su padre como respuesta:
Tu siempre tan pendiente de los "hubieras" de los demás y sí, quizás mi hijo en estos dos años que han pasado desde que se fue del país hubiera terminado la carrera de arquitectura como tú dices. Pero lo cierto, lo real hoy, es que no la ha terminado, solo que eso es lo peor para ti y lo mejor para él, pues ese cambio de planes no le ha impedido vivir, es más ya mi hijo está viviendo de verdad. Ya se trata de vivir su vida y no la de los demás. Está cumpliendo la mejor tarea que le he pedido que haga y es que construya su propia historia. Que viva su propia vida como todos lo hacen y más Alex que es un alma noble, donde solo resaltan sus virtudes. Un ser responsable, talentoso, inteligente, respetuoso, confiable, que tiene todo un camino por delante para lograr todo lo que se proponga, terminar no una sino varias carreras universitarias si así él lo desea.
Piensa en ti papá, en los tantos “hubiera” tuyos pendientes:
Si tu hubieras amado a mi madre entonces la hubieras respetado, no la hubieras maltratado, lastimado ni humillado. No hubieras sido un mujeriego, no le hubieras sido infiel en varias ocasiones. Si tu hubieras sido un hombre leal , correcto y bueno hubieras sido un esposo feliz con una esposa maravillosa.
Otros ”hubieras”:
Papá, si tú me hubieras amado me hubieras valorado. Entonces no me hubieras despreciado y tratado con odio. Si tus palabras hubieran sido amables, tu mirada tierna, compasiva y amorosa, seguramente yo no hubiera sido una niña, una adolescente, una joven y aún hoy una adulta con tantas inseguridades, lágrimas y enfermedades.
Y siguen los “hubieras”:
Si tu hubieras apreciado a los únicos nietos que tienes y que tendrás que te aman por lo que eres, su abuelo, y no por lo que tienes, hoy te hubieras gozado de su presencia y personalidades extraordinarias. Pero tú, por cómo eres, te privas de disfrutarlos, de sentir sus abrazos, de escuchar sus voces, sus risas, sus problemas y hasta sus rabietas.
Otra ración de más “hubieras”:
Papá, si no hubieras sido tan vertical con una vida cautiva de exigencias y normas inflexibles, hoy hubieras vivido y dejado vivir… a quienes te han rodeado.
Si hubieras sido honesto no exigieras hasta lo que ha sido imposible para ti cumplir y dar. ¡Hey! Pero has corrido con buena fortuna sólo que no te enteraste por tu ceguera espiritual. Resulta que has tenido hermosas personas a tu alrededor con valores verdaderos, intrínsecos en su ADN, pero que para ti son idioteces nada más.
Si tu papá, hubieras pesado a las personas por lo que son y no por lo que tienen, hubieras sido; de verdad y no de fachada; un hombre sensible y empático con la humanidad.
Papá, más ”hubieras” para cerrar:
Si tu hubieras sido amable y respetuoso de las individualidades de los demás, de sus pensamientos, gustos, opiniones, sentimientos como todos los hacen contigo, aunque obligadamente, entonces hubieras sido bienvenido en todo lugar.
Si tu hubieras apreciado lo bueno y verdadero que te ha regalado el único Dueño de la Vida de las personas, entonces hubieras saboreado la verdadera felicidad. Hubieras gozado el privilegio de una familia.
💔
Sofía luego de pensar en estas palabras, como profunda reflexión para su padre, se dispuso a escribirlas para el, quien recibió la carta sin darle importancia, como era de esperar de un hombre tan insensible como el señor Alberto. Pero lo más importante fue el efecto liberador para Sofía, quien se resolvió alejarse para siempre de su verdugo y vivir. Porque no va sufrir más por los hubieras pendientes de su padre.
De 
para el mundo ♥
para el mundo ♥ to the world ♥English
Dad, what if you HAD...
Mr. Alberto, only seeks to criticize his grandson Alex, 20 years old, and Sofia's eldest son, who took the hard but firm decision to stop his university studies in architecture with only three semesters left to finish his degree and with an excellent grade record. All to be able to go to another country to look for a better future for his family, especially for his 7 year old brother. The crisis was already hitting hard in Venezuela.
It sounds like very far-fetched and unfair but before issuing a verdict and judge, you have to know and understand the background of each Venezuelan story marked by the sad experience of migration.
The truth is that Mr. Alberto only makes an appearance at Sofia's house, his only daughter, to criticize every thought and deed that does not come from him. This is easy for those who are very controlling of the lives of all people, but very difficult for those who suffer from it, as in the case of Sofia and her children, all aspergers or mild autistic, who have had to survive not only in society but in the bosom of their own family and more under the tyranny of Mr. Alberto.
Sofia thanks God that her son Alex was able to escape... not only from the Venezuelan crisis.
After Mr. Alberto finishes his visit, he leaves with the same discourtesy with which he arrived. He does not miss the opportunity to show his contempt for his daughter and the only grandchildren he had. For Alberto it is unacceptable and unforgivable that they are of a condition that he never understood and never will. That is why he is ashamed and rejects them.
Finally, a little more relaxed, Sofia breathes as her father leaves. Always their meetings and even telephone conversations are very uncomfortable. Sofia, a 50-year-old woman, has always put up with a lot of emotional abuse because of who she is, an introverted and noble person. That has cost her a lack of knowledge of happiness, with a gray childhood and adolescence, which guaranteed her an opaque adulthood, with false flashes of light and color that occasionally allow her an obligatory, feigned and brief glow.
Anyway, already alone in her house Sofia starts to meditate on what her father said: "By now Alex would have graduated ".
She indignantly pieces together in her mind what she might say to her father in response:
You're always so aware of the "would have " of others and yes, maybe my son in these two years that have passed since he left the country would have finished his architecture degree as you say. But the truth, the real thing today, is that he has not finished it, only that is the worst thing for you and the best thing for him, because this change of plans has not prevented him from living, in fact my son is really living. It is already about living his life and not that of others. He is fulfilling the best task I have asked him to do and that is to build his own story. Let him live his own life like everyone else does and more so Alex who is a noble soul, where only his virtues stand out. A responsible, talented, intelligent, respectful, trustworthy being, who has a whole road ahead of him to achieve everything he sets his mind to, to finish not one but several university careers if he so desires.
Think of you dad, of the many "woulda "still woulda loved you:
If you had loved my mother then you would have respected her, not would have mistreated, hurt or humiliated her. You would not have been a womanizer, you would not have been unfaithful to her on several occasions. If you would have* been a loyal , correct and good man would have** been a happy husband with a wonderful wife.
Other "would have ":
Dad, if you had loved me you would have valued me. Then you wouldn't have despised me and treated me with hatred. If your words had been kind, your gaze tender, compassionate and loving, surely I would not have* been a child, a teenager, a young woman and even today an adult with so many insecurities, tears and illnesses.
And the "would have " follows:
If you had appreciated the only grandchildren you have and will ever have who love you for who you are, their grandfather, and not for what you have, today you would have enjoyed their presence and extraordinary personalities. But you, because of how you are, you deprive yourself of enjoying them, of feeling their hugs, of hearing their voices, their laughter, their problems and even their tantrums..
Another helping of more "would have ":
Dad, if you had not had been so vertical with a life held captive by inflexible demands and rules, today you would have lived and let live...those around you.
If you had been honest you wouldn't demand even what has been impossible for you to fulfill and give. Hey! But you've run with good fortune only you didn't know about it because of your spiritual blindness. It turns out that you have had beautiful people around you with true values, intrinsic in their DNA, but to you they are idiocy nothing more.
If your dad, had weighed people for who they are and not what they have, you would have been; for real and not window dressing; a sensitive and empathetic man of humanity.
Dad, more "would have" to close:
If you had been kind and respectful of the individualities of others, of their thoughts, tastes, opinions, feelings as everyone does with you, albeit obligingly, then you would have been welcome everywhere.
If you had appreciated the good and true that the only Owner of the Life of people has given you, then you would have tasted true happiness. You would have enjoyed the privilege of a family.
💔
Sofia, after thinking of these words as a profound reflection for her father, set out to write them for him, who received the letter without giving it any importance, as was to be expected from a man as insensitive as Mr. Alberto. But the most important thing was the liberating effect for Sofia, who resolved to get away from her tormentor forever and live. Because she will no longer suffer for her father's unfinished haves.
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