This week's Weekend Engagement Challenge had more financial questions in it. As I just published an article yesterday about my financial goals, I went for the "What now?" part, that I actually had asked myself a lot of times.
This is the question:
If you didn't have to work for your financial security (didn't need a job) what would you be doing instead?
Fathering
Okay, this one is obvious. My main job right now is being a father, full-time, alone. As I don't really have to work at the moment, but do it to be a role model and have some extra cash for hobbies, I find myself being able to focus on complementing the Waldorf-Education that Lily is receiving. After almost one year, I notice some deficiencies in there, so I try to sort those out at home.
Social Networks
The classic ones - in real life, with coffee or beer or a movie. There are many single elderly in my town, and they're always so happy if someone organizes an event that is within their possibilities (schedule, accessibility). But also my peers in the school need something like that. A place where the kids can play together while the parents chill out. Right now, I don't find the energy to make that happen - Lily is my main focus, as mentioned.
Projects
I have so many ideas that would help out our community in a really good way! One recycling - yes, but really. We have people driving after the garbage truck, gathering everything that is recyclable and selling it to the big companies for a few bucks. That can be organized. Even more important - many families around Cotacachi raise pigs, so separating general compost from pig-food would help them out immensely. Almost nothing goes to waste.
There are many beggars around - I could establish a found and send them to pick trash in the fields and next to the rivers, paying them for work (most will decline though, they almost always decline work because begging is more profitable - I tried).
The bigger question
As I kind of am in the great situation of not having to worry about financials too much anymore, I go on to this one:
What would I be doing if Lily wasn't living with me, if she was adult already?
First of all, spend time with my girlfriend. After 5 years, we're doing great considering the huge change of me suddenly being a full time dad and her daughter jumping heads first into ultra-puberty. But it's not easy.
I should really hire a nanny. I mean, I do have the money. I just don't know how to implement one in our schedules in a way that helps us.
I would put spending time with friends in second, but there aren't many of the old ones left, and new ones are still in construction. So I put travel in second. I miss to travel, being by myself, sorting things out on the fly. Supposedly, Lily's mom will take her for the 8 weeks of summer vacation. I'm thinking about getting to know Colombia, or maybe Argentina. I have some friends in Chile I could visit, old friends, from University.
Two Worlds.
Who am I, if not a founder?
Who am I, if not a father?
It's hard to imagine either of those becoming reality any time in the near future. But there are dreams. But:
The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.
- Marcus Aurelius -
That was the phrase from the challenge. The thing about thinking up dreams is that they can easily become a desire. Then an obsession. And then I will be manipulating the things that are important to me in order to make my dreams come true. And I'll find them empty, hollow, because I will have acted against my own values, and there's no happiness in incoherence.