All photos shared in this post are mine.
I feel like it's been a while since I last participated in the Weekend Engagement. I'm not going to lie, it's been a crazy tough couple of months and, even though I've been trying to do activities to make myself feel better and boost both my energy and immune system, I'm still not quite there yet.
I wanted to add a little thank you to the whole Weekend community. I might've not been as active as I would've liked to be for the past few weeks but reading your posts, comments and just knowing I'm part of this wonderful, super talented group of people - all this has helped me push through during my hardest of days. And since I've been really down lately and feeling far from lucky, I thought I'd remind myself of a time/ a moment where I thought the universe was on my side.
I'll start with a memorable mention...Actually, THE memorable mention - obviously, Sophia's birth. She's my world and has been for the past almost 6 years. She surprises me with how intelligent, kind-hearted and pure she is. Not a day goes by without me thanking life for allowing me to be her mom as it's for sure my greatest achievement 😊
I thought of making this the centre of my post but, it's such a clear winner and something I didn't even have to think about. I wanted and needed to dig deeper; to try and find a moment in my life that has changed me in an irreversible but positive way. Even though it might've not seemed that way back then. And so, I present to you my brain's conclusion 😁
Coming to Canada
To start off, moving was definitely not my decision. I was barely entering my teens when my mom decided to emigrate from Bulgaria. It was a bit of a shock at the beginning. Everything I have ever known was in Bulgaria. Everyone I have ever felt close to was in Bulgaria. The plans I had made about my future involved being in my home, in my country - Bulgaria. Little did I know, the process would take years so I suppose that gave me a bit of time to kind of get used to what was about to happen.
A lot happened within these 6-7 years that it took my mom to leave Bulgaria and establish her new life in Canada. My dad was clearly not happy but, in my mom's defence, he was barely present to begin with. She was dating an older gentleman who she wanted to immigrate to Canada with. My brother liked him. I never did. I believe it's because I avoided spending time with him whenever he was around. Deep down inside, no matter how many times my dad disappointed me, I was still hoping he'd get better, get the help he needed and get back with my mom.
After my mom's initial application was denied due to her boyfriend's age, she applied again and this time, as a single mom. She got approved and within a couple of years, she moved to Montreal. A few months later, my brother and I followed in her footsteps and on October 4th 2009, we were on Canadian soil.
As you can tell by the time stamp, this was taken within the first couple of weeks of us in Montreal. I remember feeling so lost and alone - everything seemed distant, unknown, unfamiliar. It took me years to start liking living abroad and it definitely wasn't easy.
Looking back at this now, I'm glad we moved. I'm happy my mom found it in herself to leave her past along with the man she loved behind so she can try and build a better life for herself and for us. It takes a lot of courage to leave your whole life behind. I don't think we would've had the same opportunities if we had stayed back in Bulgaria. I don't think we would've grown to be the people we are today if we had not moved. And, as much as it hurts me to say this, I believe my dad would've made our lives quite difficult.
I've always been scared of change. The thought of having to adjust to a new way of life was probably the biggest one I've had to face so far. Yet, I can think of a million reasons why this was the best decision my mom has ever made and probably the hardest one for her to stick to. But she did it and for that, I will be forever grateful. Having a child of my own, knowing she will not face the same struggles I did and will grow up in a country where she can actually build something - it makes my heart beam with joy.
As much as I know it took some hard work on my mom's end to make this happen, I know for sure there's a sliver of luck the universe gifted us. I wholeheartedly believe in this, even if I can't explain it, and nothing will ever change my mind.
Thank you 