I have a pretty quiet life most of the time. Not much going on - Basically go work an underpaid intern gig my countrymen call NSS, and back to my rabbit hole I call home. Maybe a movie and some social media,Hive mostly. That’s really just it. Not much to be happy or sad about. Just a quiet life that puts me somewhere in between happy and sad. Okay, I guess.
Recently though, my life has been getting active with events. And I wish I meant that in a good way.
It’s been a series of accidents and unfortunate events, and most recently, also a wrong choice. And why that wrong choice, boils down to human nature, I guess. Maybe not, I don’t know.
Humans are social animals. We take solace in providing each other assistance and having others come to our aid when needed as well. But some times, in our attempts to come to the aid of the people we love, our judgement gets clouded and we make mistakes some bad choices.
In our nature, we’re fascinating creatures, and there’s no limit to what we can or can’t do. We surprise ourselves. So much that in certain cases, we do things even we didn’t think we were capable of. I don’t want to say “in the name of love”, because that sounds cringey and gay. Lol
Sometimes you think you have the unwavering conscience and values of a prophet, but you slip up one time and make a choice that shocks even you. Life.
The problem is that mistake or not, you made it and you need to make amends.
Naturally people are dynamic. There's no telling what they think, maybe up to or what they're capable of even.
This human nature makes it very difficult to trust other people loosely, especially when they’re people you don’t know very personally.
It gets worse when you deal with typical cases of mistrust all the time. It becomes almost natural to not trust anyone It creates an almost blurry and unclear lens to view people through. Honest mistakes and dubious intentions are put in the same box until proven otherwise.
The police find it hard to trust citizens who look like thieves because they deal with criminal cases everyday and have developed an “anyone is capable of anything” thinking.)
It helps when you know who you’re dealing with on a personal level. Then you have enough foundation to make a better judgement of whether or not they’re a fundamentally good person that made a shitty choice, or if they’re just bad, basically.
Social media doesn’t have information of people enough for us to truly know them because people are a lot more complicated than the two-captioned instagram photos or even the several thousand words Hive blogs.
So for my biggest fear right now, it’s having my left being defined by mistakes or wrong choices I made at some point. I make a lot of mistakes but when I do, I don’t deny that I made them. I accept them and learn from them. But like I said, trust is also a very complicated commodity and even if it is ever gained back, begs questions of distrust for every minor inconvenience a person might have with their offender in the future.
This weekend’s weekend engagement prompt by 
all images here are mine