You may have noticed that I haven't been blogging very actively lately. Life doesn't always follow a straight line; sometimes you're busy with this and other times with that. Lately, I've been completely focused on pyrography, hoping to build an income with it. To achieve that, I mainly have to ensure I have enough work and can show diversity. Then comes the job of really getting the word out. I haven't gotten that far yet. But anyway, that's not what this blog is about. Even though I haven't been active myself, I've read and seen a few things here and there. One of those things was this week's weekend engagement. And despite my low motivation, I couldn't let that pass me by.
Not Just Terrible, He Was A Nightmare!
Anyone who has ever had a terrible neighbor knows how deeply that can cut into your life. Your home is supposed to be a place of rust, a safe haven, but for us, it became a source of constant stress and even fear at times. Our former neighbor changed from a friendly neighbor who you could laugh with to a downright nightmare.
First It Was 'Just' Annoying
It started with small things. He picked fights over trivialities, made irrelevant nasty remarks our way, and tried to smear us to other neighbors. We didn't respond to this, but it was certainly annoying. And during the day I practically walked on eggshells to make sure he wasn't bothered by us. An outside door that slammed shut just a little too hard was enough to make him jump out of his skin, and me to jump a meter in the air in fright. If it had stopped there, it would have been a situation of, "It's not nice, but you learn to take it into account". Unfortunately, it didn't stop there, it escalated quickly.
Don't Come After My Dogs!
One beautiful summer day, the animal police suddenly showed up at the gate. I was sitting outside with Lex, Rowan, Myla, and Lana, and suddenly saw a police car pull up the driveway. At first, I thought they had to see our neighbor because that wouldn't be the first time. But to my amazement, it was not the regular police. It was animal police, and they were there for me. They had received a complaint that I was abusing my dogs, that they were being neglected, and that they were covered in fleas. In disbelief, I explained that none of this was true, but of course, they didn't take my word for it. I had to call all three of my dogs, they checked them with a flea comb, they looked at their behavior towards me, and the backyard was inspected. After everything was found to be in order I was warned that if there was another complaint they would confiscate my dogs. I was devastated at that moment. The threat of my dogs being taken away from me hit me like a bomb. I knew immediately who was behind this. When I confronted him, he blamed the neighbors, but I knew better. I had a good relationship with the neighbors. This was purely his way of making our lives miserable after his other tricks had failed because we had never responded to his quarrelsome behavior.
Oh No, Not Again!
It didn't stop there, the animal police came again. This time to checked whether my dogs were vicious. Because there had supposedly been complaints again. Now I knew for sure that it came from the neighbor. There had been an incident once with him and Lana. A shepherd is a guard dog, and if a shepherd is outside in his place, you shouldn't just walk in without permission from the owner. That was exactly what the neighbor tried to do once, and not only that. He also tried to threaten me while I was painting on the ground outside. That doesn't go well when three shepherds are walking around, and before I could stop it, Lana had bitten his clog. Which wouldn't have happened if he hadn't come at me in a very threatening and screaming way. I explained this to the animal police and invited them for a cup of coffee, and fortunately, my dogs behaved perfectly at that moment. So the unfounded accusation that they were false was also dispelled. Fortunately, I was dealing with someone who also understood dog behavior. After this, the animal police also said that if there was another complaint from that person, they would not come anymore. They knew by then that it was okay. That was a relief. But both my partner and I wondered what would happen next. Because it was clear to us that he wouldn't let it go.
Our Beautiful Bonsai Trees, Completely Destroyed!
We were soon proven right. We visited a garden center together for an afternoon. Just relaxing and enjoying ourselves. But when we got home, we found pure destruction. The bonsai that my partner had worked so hard on with so much love, carefully cared for and shaped, were broken in the garden. The beautiful pots in which they stood, shattered into pieces. I can’t describe the helplessness and anger we felt when we picked up the pieces and found the hole in the wire mesh from which all the destruction had been done. Why then? What possessed someone to do this? What on earth had we ever done to him?
It Got Even Worse
It didn’t stop. There were countless more incidents, and we had to keep tiptoeing because every little sound caused a new outburst of anger and shouting in his utility room. At night we heard him sneaking around our house. Sometimes we got up and saw him at our windows. The threats became increasingly intense. He would make sure we would be thrown out of the house, he would destroy us. It just kept going. Eventually, my partner went to report it because it was getting worse and worse and we couldn’t ignore it so easily anymore. It was impossible to talk to him. The stress was eating away at us. Sleeping became difficult, and relaxing impossible. It was exhausting!
Double Trouble!
And then his girlfriend moved in with him. Instead of one problem, we now had two. His girlfriend turned out to be just as bad. Together they formed a duo that crossed all boundaries. Until that one morning in June 2020, when my partner had just left for work, I suddenly saw six police cars driving up here. They parked in his driveway, here in front of the house, on the grass of the front garden ... and I heard a lot of shouting and cursing. I am not a very curious person in the sense that I keep an eye on what is happening at the neighbors all day long through the window, but I wanted to know this. And so I saw that both neighbors were arrested. And there was life here next to me in the garden all day long. Solutions had to be found for the rabbits and guinea pigs, cats and dogs. After that very busy day, it became quiet. The neighbors had both been arrested and were in custody. I did not know why, and I did not care. I was mainly glad that they were gone and only hoped that they would not come back. She was released after a week, but our landlord told her she couldn't stay here. He didn't have a lease with her, so after she took what was valuable, she made the landlord pay for all the mess.
So Glad, My Intuition Protected Me
It wasn't until a few weeks later that I found out from the newspaper what a monster he was. He had drugged, assaulted, and raped women. His victims were vulnerable women, and people with disabilities who had difficulty defending themselves. When I read that newspaper article, everything fell into place. I suddenly understood why he had turned against us/me so much. At first, he was friendly, maybe even too friendly. He always wanted to come over when I was home alone, he always invited me for coffee with him. But something inside me didn't trust it. I always kept him at a distance, in a friendly but firm way. In retrospect, I'm so glad I listened to my intuition. If I hadn't, I could easily have been one of his victims.
Peace In The Countryside
After they were arrested and detained, peace returned here. But the fear, stress, and helplessness from that time have certainly left their mark. Sometimes I hear a noise at night and I can still jump. Fortunately, I immediately realize that he is gone, and that relief is indescribable.