I'm fine, is one of the greatest lies I've ever told in my life. It seems like a simple lie, that doesn't take much effort to say.
But the reality is that it takes a lot of effort to articulate those words, to pronounce them while your brain short-circuits trying to successfully get them out of your mouth, with the perfect intonation to make it sound sincere. Plus you have to work to make sure that the expressions on your face don't give you away, that your eyes shine, that your smile is so big that they can notice your teeth.
All this while the heart sinks in the chest, a pain so unbearable that the urge to cry is always there, yet the tears do not show, they get trapped, to the point of drowning in memories, others manage to survive and escape, but are quickly wiped away and the brain dries them.
Leaving sometimes a dry, empty, almost lifeless soul.
But you live, others see you laugh, talk, eat, they don't realize the daily struggle you have with yourself.
I'm fine, I don't know how many times I said it. How many times I filled my life with band-aids until my brain could no longer cope with the hard work of pretending every day and doing all the activities of the day when I really needed to heal.
The day came to admit that it was all a lie and to seek help, to feel and to stop being silent, to silence the real voices of my heart.
Nothing as harmful as being silent and not asking for help. Nothing like living in the dark and not being you.
Now I am not the best, but I am much better than before, more conscious and when I am not, I express it, to heal to be freer, to love, to be able to receive love.
Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)
Pictures Xioami Redmi 9C
Edited in powerpoint
