The weekend community gives several topics to write on every weekend as a part of their post topics prompt and on this week's post topics titled “music”, I have decided to answer options one which says;
Tell us about a piece of music or song you love, that moves you, and makes you feel deeply. Share the link to the music if you like.
THE BACKSTORY
Music has always played a significant role in my life but I never understood how important and healing music could be to me until I fell into depression once again in the year 2020.
Previously I had struggled with a series of mental health issues which included depression and anxiety and for the most part, I didn’t want to live but after trying to end it and constantly failing, I decided that I might as well try to exist and fake happiness to avoid concerns.
My process of “faking happiness” brought about what I called “the happiness concept” which meant I would always try to be the happiest person in the room even though most days I was dying inside and during the days where I couldn’t fake it I would run to music.
THE MUSICAL PIECES THAT ALWAYS MAKE ME FEEL DEEPLY
During the hardest point of my depression, I discovered two songs that made me feel like I wasn’t alone and they expressed feelings that I didn’t know how to express properly in words, the first was titled “trying my best by Anson Seabra” and the second was “She Used to Be Mine by Sara Bareilles”.
I discovered the first song while scrolling randomly on TikTok and just hearing the first lines made me bawl my eyes out, for a moment I felt like I was heard, and going through the comments made me hurt a bit less because I saw a lot of other people who related to what I was feeling.
I heard the second song in a movie and immediately, I went to Spotify to listen, I will always say that I have never heard a song describe me so accurately at that point in time like this song.
These two songs gave off the same energy to me and it made me feel absolutely good because whenever I would listen to them, there was always this comforting feeling that I would get; the feeling of not being alone.
These days I barely listen to them because while I would always love them, I am in a way better place than I was but they will always be my go-to songs whenever I feel myself going down.
My favorite verse in each song is;
Trying my best by Anson Seabra
I wish that you could see the pain that I've seen
All of the times I spent being not me
I hope you know that it's not always happy in my head
She Used to Be Mine by Sara Bareilles
She's imperfect but she tries
She is good but she lies
She is hard on herself
She is broken and won't ask for help
She is messy but she's kind
She is lonely most of the time
She is all of this mixed up
And baked in a beautiful pie
I will be putting down links to these songs below and also tagging to listen to them because I know that she is going through a lot of things right now.