I must say this weekend concept requires a careful thought and consideration, after a long thought, I have finally found an answer to the first question.
"Is there something about your self you know you should let go of but haven't been able to? How does it affect you and why can't you let it go"
There's really something about myself that I really need to let go. It's more of like an habit that I have allowed to grow in me.
As a friend or someone I'm closer to, I always expect them to help me with whatever i need at any moment i needed help.
I am always expectant, looking forward to something from someone or somewhere. I have totally lost interest in myself or finding solution on my own. I never try things on my own, I rather expect my friends to help me, either they have the capacity to do so or not, so anytime they're unable to meet my expectations, I feel pained. It's just a selfish attitude of mine. It's not as if there's an obligation or duty they needed to perform. I just wanted it as something they have to do.
It has affected me in many ways apart from being embarrassed and disappointed I had a kind of feeling in my heart that made me feel inferior to others. Like they are better than me, in many ways expectations from others has made me lose interest in finding help on my own. I'm getting better as I have started learning to be dependent on myself and not to expect from others.
One other thing I feel I should let go is the habit of not taking medication any time I feel sick, either severe or little. I would rather keep silence about it rather than been scolded when I eventually refuse to take drugs. I know it's bad but I am not able to let it go because of my hatred for medicine, including the smell of drugs. On a rare occurrence when my sickness gets out of hand, I will have to settle down for injections with is better and pleasing to me, or I will be forced to take the drug at first instance but I will not complete the whole dosage eventually.
Thank you for reading.