It is time for another #squirrelsunday
Social media has hit the squirrels kingdom by storm. All it took was a racy little flexxer to brag about how many walnuts she found in just one week! First you have to subscribe to her program to learn how. Meanwhile she keeps jetting off to exciting new trees to generate envy.
The country squirrel wants to be walnut rich too... How do I make 100 walnuts a week?
Well, first you have to subscribe to my program for only 10 acorns a month... Then you can learn the secret to be rich like meeeee. You get an acorn, you get a walnut, you get a pecan!!!
Ok let me go out into the forest and scavenge around for 10 acorns... Maybe I can find enough to buy one month worth of the secrets to squirrly success.
Even the city squirrels are searching around the park for enough acorns to subscribe. Do these cigarette butts count for anything? Sadly they had to resort to breaking and entering human shops to pay for their subscriptions, many were torn up by house cats during the process...
This guy is warning the others it is a scam. Hey guys I worked like crazy to get a subscription and it is just a multi-level marketing scheme. They just get you to recruit more squirrels to collect more acorns and you end up getting a 5% cut for each new recruit.
The social media storm was so strong that the guy who warned them of the scam was immediately banned off all platforms for squeekinformation and squirrlibel laws. Ah well you guys can run around in circles for the almighty influencer... I'll go invest in a walnut coin derivative instead.
The rodents behind the star influencer are a couple Romanian chipmunk brothers. They are keeping a low profile for now as they are probably breaking all kinds of rodent laws in multiple provinces...
This one was finally captured by the marmots in his homeland. He ended up having to bribe his way out of prison and rebrand his identity to a motivational speaker.
That's all for now, thanks for looking :-)