When the world was paralyzed by the Covid-19 pandemic, although at that time I lived practically alone, I was blessed by a litter of kittens that came to my house and kept me company, I also began to talk with a new virtual friend with whom from the first moment I had an almost magical connection, they were days and nights of many pleasant and very special conversations, as well as exchanging images of our day to day.

She did not use emoticons in her messages, she said that it was difficult for her to be expressive, she also warned me that she did not like hugs or tokens of affection, however, she was very attentive and gentle, I could talk to her about almost any topic and it was always very pleasant and enjoyable.

Although we lived in the same country, it was not easy to see each other, since we were in the middle of confinement and we lived in different cities, there were months of immense desire to see each other, without being able to do it, then I became very ill and I moved away because my mood was not the same, we still kept in touch but no longer with the same eagerness of the beginning.

As time went by, she became colder and a little inaccessible, but we still communicated from time to time.

One day, she came to Caracas, the city where I live, to run errands and wrote me to meet and so we did, but the meeting was not satisfactory, she was totally hermetic and distant, I felt as if suddenly our connection of the beginning had been exhausted.

I arrived home sad and disappointed, however, she wrote me asking me if I had arrived well and all that protocol, I was a little puzzled, I responded anyway and we continued in sporadic contact.

After all the things we had talked about before and having seen her personally, I have thought that she has the condition of Asperger's syndrome, I did not ask her because I did not know how to do it without being something uncomfortable for her.

I always felt that there has been something special between us, a connection that comes from another life, a connection of souls that have made a pact before being born. From our first meeting 2 years ago, then we said things to each other that kept us apart for months until last Christmas we met again, this second meeting was very different from the first one, this time I could see her warm and loving side, I felt her hugs for a whole night. He confided many things about his life and I could understand why he tried to appear so cold.

Among so many things, she told me about her cactus plants and the admiration she feels for them, which made me associate herself with these succulents, showing an exterior almost full of thorns so that whoever gets close should be careful not to get hurt, a defense mechanism to hide that she can be so vulnerable.

Last Christmas, we spent a couple of days and a couple of nights splendid, it was pure magic, I thought that in the course of this year we would see each other very often, but for things of life it did not happen again.

A few months ago, my sister-in-law was showing me the notebooks that she was given for her daughters in the company she works for, among them there was one of smiling cactus, I told her that I would love to give it to a friend and she gave it to me to do it, however, I have not seen her again, for things of life she went on her way without me and I did not try to touch any of her thorns again, I was being affected by the prickles just for a trace of affection, so I decided not to communicate with her anymore.

Today I would love to see her walking down the street, meet her casually, carry the notebook in my bag, just take it out, look into her steady eyes and offer it to her with a faint smile, wrapped in a gift package, not say a word, see her smile at least for a second, see her gesture of pleasant surprise as when I kissed her eyes and forehead a year ago.

She loves cactus, she finds it hard to smile, she likes to take daily notes of things that go through her mind, I think she could appreciate such a simple gift, I think for her it could have meaning, I would have liked to give her this gift this Christmas.

Thank you for reading

_{Photographs from my personal gallery}