Welcome, friends, to my blog! Today we’re going to answer a question about the ego: how it has helped me—and how it hasn’t. And yes, I used to have a purely negative view of the ego, until I realized that it’s actually a tool that really helps you see the good and the bad, and keeps you grounded.
What part of the process has been disrupted? Well, right now, it’s my recovery. As a music teacher, my voice is one of my most essential tools, and that’s where my ego got the better of me. Believing that my voice was invincible and wanting to give my best ended up prolonging a process I haven’t yet emerged from—and it’s been quite a struggle. My ego, at that moment, drove me to keep going out of a constant desire not to fail or to miss out on my work and what I love, which led me to severe dysphonia for which I still don’t have a definitive solution. I know it’s a fairly long process, and at that point, I believe my ego played a significant role by interfering in a rather delicate health matter.
But beyond that, at this point my “positive ego,” so to speak, has had an influence on me that has kept me from falling apart. While it’s true that music has always been a part of me, not being able to rely 100% on my main tool—my voice—has led my ego to seek out other alternatives.
It has pushed me to find other ways of teaching, giving me new tools and strategies that don’t put my voice at such risk. It has pushed me to be better, and it’s been a total challenge; and every challenge leaves behind beautiful, positive things, which is what I want to focus on now. I understand that the ego is a tool that, if not handled carefully, can turn everything into a disaster or, on the contrary, make you shine to the fullest. I used to think of the ego as entirely negative, but that’s really not the case when we know how to use it to our advantage, with humility and good intentions.