Hey, any of y'all know where I can buy this donkey?
Dan
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(Okay, fine you caught me: It's a quote of mine)
Well now, shall we chop this liver in half?
What has made you laugh or cry unexpectedly (or both). Explain your answers, the situation, why, when and where
Ahhh... so many situations my friends. So much so, that I'm beginning to think life is just one big ole comedy show! Regardless, I have found that when it comes to either laughing or crying, or crying-laughing, there is a fine yet sharp distinction and relation between them.
Co-existing as opposites is one thing but co-working together, is another thing they just can't do without: You can laugh until you cry and cry until you laugh. And what makes another person cry, can as well make you laugh your ass out.
Welcome to life, where laughter meets crying.
I know. Life is weird.
Ha! I'll never forget the morning of December 26, 2018. I was back in my hometown with the rest of my extended family and we were going to celebrate the holidays together as a family. Long story shortened, the Christmas party went very well that night (so well, I think I might've even gotten a little high that night lol) but the REAL Christmas surprise came, when I awoke the next morning.
Not surprisingly, everyone was still fast asleep even though it was past 11:00am at the time(lol, the party must've been too much for em) all, except for my Grandad who was using his computer on his special side of the couch, looking as confused as a caveman whom had just discovered fire for the very first time.
Ah... What is all this?
You know, at first I wasn't going to say anything but after bewildering the horrendous and hilarious expression on the old man's face, I just had to ask:
"Hey Grandpa, is there a problem?" I said.
LoL, the old man was very reluctant to answer me at first but, he later caved in:
"Ehh... Please, who are all this people disturbing me on my browser? Who is this girl and how does she know my location?" My grandpa beckoned.
"Huh?" I replied, feeling very confused by his remark. And so, I decided to go check on what he was doing on the computer.
My goodness, you would've laughed to see the expression on my face when I saw what the problem was!
Turns out that the old man was looking up something online and happened to find himself on this website full of ads!
And some of the ads were things like:
Lol, men of culture - this one should be quite familiar to you :)
Oh man, I couldn't stop laughing when I saw the ads! But the tears only truly began coming, after my grandad's reaction:
"Haha... Don't worry Grandpa, they're only ads" I said.
"Ads?" the old man asked.
"ADS Grandpa! Like advertisements, commercials?..." I replied.
"Oh, oh okay... Like that pampers one we use to watch on Tv?" he chuckled.
"Ehh, something like that." I replied.
And just when I thought we were done with this whole drama, the old man continued:
But wait a minute, what is this Brazzers thing?
My God, I must've felt a funeral in my brain when he said this! The whole thing was just way too good!😂
Brazzers? Hmm... I'm not too sure about that one Gramps. Uhm, why don't you click on the ad and find out? :)
I replied with a huge smirk on my face and watery tears in my eyes. Alas, I'm guessing the old man must've sensed my mischievousness because he then refused!
Okay, so is that all Grandpa?
I asked the old man, ready to go after having enough laughter for one morning.
Mmm... Yes. Yes, you can go now. Thank you.
And so with those words I got up the couch, and proceeded to storm out of the living room. But suddenly, without warning, the old man called for me again:
Wait! Wait!
He belted.
Oh no, what now Grandpa?...
I asked.
Eh yes. What about this Becky girl?
He replied while looking at the picture of the girl with those funny glasses of his.
Yes grandpa... What about her?
I asked suspiciously.
Eh... Didn't they say she was waiting to see me?
He replied.
I'm not gonna lie, he looked so adorable and naive when he said that. However, I wasn't just going to stand there and let my Grandad fall into the forsaken hands of those ghastly Ads, so I simply told him something that would get him off the internet and computer immediately:
Grandpa no! Don't click on it!!
It's a scam ad. You click on it, they take you to their site, and then they scam you of all your money instantly!!
Needless to say, the idea worked. The old man didn't touch his computer again for the next two days.
Ahh... this time I recall another moment where I was hurt really really bad that i actually cried:
Yes, I believe I was just in the 4th grade at the time. And unpleasantly, I remember sitting next to this one kid called Isaac.
To say the least, we were more of acquaintances than friends at the time( I didn't like Isaac at all) however, for some reason, Isaac always felt like it was okay to play all those friendly type of pranks friends would often play on each other. Sadly, this time he played one on me and he did so with a pen - a very sharp one!
There I was, sitting next to Isaac in English class, just having a good old time when suddenly, I was called upon the teacher to answer a question.
I was a brilliant student so of course this was a no brainer.
Underneath is good example of a Preposition Mrs... Fuck, I can't remember my Elementary school teachers name.
"Correct!" She said and bade me to seat back down. Alas, I had no idea of the sharp pointy pen, fuckface Issac had placed on my seat as I slowly cushioned my bottom to seat.
You know when I think about it now, I just wonder: what type of sick bastard derives joy from seeing someone sit on a sharp pen?
I mean, what's the goddamn joke there??
Anyway, I ended up sitting on the blue pointy pen and long story shortened, it basically disvirgined my butthole.
Ahh... when I think about the whole thing now, I wonder what that fucker Isaac is up to now?...
So yeah folks, essentially, LAUGH when needed and CRY when needed. Although, my experiences don't necessarily show the importance of doing either one of the two(or both at the same time) but that doesn't mean you can't use laughter or tears to relive yourself when needed to.
It's just like the famous Lebanese writer said in his lyrical poem: A Tear and a Smile
A tear to purify my heart and give me understanding
Of life's secrets and hidden things.
A smile to draw me nigh to the sons of my kind and
To be a symbol of my glorification of the gods.
A tear to unite me with those of broken heart;
A smile to be a sign of my joy in existence.
