Someone once told me I was being too judgy, and I was only seeing things through a lens that doesn’t have an effect on me but on the other person. Of course, I tried to get all defensive but I just realized they were right. I was only seeing one side of the story and that wasn’t enough to draw any conclusions whatsoever. But really, that wasn’t my point. I wasn’t trying to be judgy but for the fact that the person saw it that way, I had to accept because I definitely said it the wrong way and maybe the wrong time and I was tagged a judge.
It was so interesting how my quick repentance wasn’t accepted as well and I wonder what that was on the person’s end. And that experience taught me something. It taught me that for one to call another a judge, they themselves are also a judge. My elders would always use the illustration of the fingers. While pointing a finger to someone, the rest fingers are pointing to you right back. No matter what a person does, I try as much as possible to not see them as being judgy even though that’s what they are doing. Why? Because I know they are making a point, even though it is one out of the hundreds. I take my time to learn from them even when it hurts badly because I want to be better, I live to be better and I know the only way I can achieve that is by learning and accepting corrections even when some things are not presented the best way.
But not everyone is like me and can ever be like me. I keep learning from them and accept them that see me as a judgy person whenever I try to speak up and that is fine. My main goal is not to convince anyone to do anything my way. My goal is to tell you when you are not doing something right and leave you to make the decision for yourself, whether or not I’m the one seeing things from a faulty lens or not. And I expect the same thing from you. The beautiful part is that we will always know the truth in the end. So why rush it?
My advice to whoever cares to listen is that, do whatever you feel is right. When people “judge” you, you can either see it as that or see it as them trying to help you get better (unknowingly or knowingly to them). You don’t have to take whatever they tell you but don’t try to stop them from telling you. When you do, you keep losing your chances of becoming better. Yes, we might not be in others shoes to know how it truly feels but that shouldn’t stop us from telling them they stepped on a poo when we see it. Too bad they most times think you are always talking of the discomfort they feel inside and hinder themselves from fixing the other problems they have.
I’m not perfect but I’m striving to be perfect. Christ, his apostles and people that strive to do the will of God are my role models because I know humans are with faults. But that doesn’t stop me from learning from them. It might hurt sometimes when they do but I know I’ll be grateful in the future. These days, I’m learning to take the corrections or judgement as some will call it, that are hurtful because it only means there is an atom of truth in it and that way, I believe when I’m humble enough to accept it, it will be more to my advantage than even to them that have corrected me.
To everyone that has ever taken their time to always tell me the truth, corrected me, judge me and even scolded me, I’m grateful. I know that day I wasn’t the so happiest person, I even almost stopped you from being able to correct me but thanks to you all, I see the love beyond the judgement/correction. Of course, not every correction is to be accepted but by God’s grace, my spirit bears me witness and gives me the grace to know the truth even in the face of lies. The only problem is just for me to accept and to do the right thing.
I’m throwing my biased mind towards corrections and judgment into the flame. The truth hurts but honestly if you are scared of telling me the truth because you think that will make me feel bad, it’s fine. Hopefully someone else will, hehe.
Thank you for reading through. ❤️