I woke up to the sound of my beloved device, Is It just me who loves the sensation, the rhythm received from an alarm clock, it shows that it is another day to get something done.
My legs did it work, walking me out of bed to wash off every filthiness of yesterday’s from my face, I learnt from Joe, mom’s business friend, that washing your face right after the bed gives a clear vision to your day. I don’t know if this is true — but hey, whatever Joe says.
My mom has been in one of her good moods lately, she keeps displaying her culinary skills with happiness. Leaving the kitchen with a glass of water, I headed straight to my room, leaving my mum to hum to whatever was making her happy.
I am not particularly morose nor am I depressed, I just don’t get why I want people's talks — gossip, lies, palaver—convoluting right in my cerebrum. I’ll rather spend my time reading. Dad always says I am a special kind of being.
My ear quickly grabbed the sound of my door opening which was immediately followed by a fuss. I sighed, She stared at me all flushed, and she came to sit on my bed, I could hear her chuckling.. “pancakes?” My mom said handling a plate. “Just as you like it.” Mom smiled and left.
I smiled but the smile quickly fade when I remembered that I still haven’t picked a dress. Is it this hard? I sighed. My book flipped as the wind Change direction to my window -the power of the air- remembering me that I still need to finish five chapters of ‘the silent of the patient’ by Alex, according to my weekly goal.
I almost screamed when I couldn’t get what to wear. Bella should have my throat ripped out, why torture me like this? I couldn’t bring myself to tell her I couldn’t make it, this has been her dream event, and she has pleaded with me to come since forever.
I eventually concluded on a dress, a long brown dress with lace right at the neck, it has a design of little ruffles on the side, I still doubt if I would fit in this dress, which was my mom’s though but I wore it to my cousin’s birthday party while I was 14.
“Finally,” I said and I fell on my bed, I looked sideways at my book which has been yowling at me since I had neglected it but I still neglected it.
The anxiety loom within my soul, a war within my emotions. I could hear whispers of uncertainty, the thoughts of fraternizing with people is like digging my own grave. Amidst the feeling of introversion and uneasiness, I still feel a glimmer of hope.. maybe, just maybe.
The weather was chilly, I could feel the cold air bond to every bit of my skin, making my skin shiver. Each air hit my skin like a bully trying to snaffle away the warmth in me. I wasn’t quite sure if it was just the weather or if it was the looming party that awaits me.
“Hey, Pearl. I called the cleaner…” My mom paused and stared at the dress, how did I manage to miss the door opening? “Ha, what is this? You’re attending your grandparent's burial ceremony?” She is half yelled. “We going to the store now.” Mom commanded. Ha, God please save.
I stood there under the big shining chandelier, I could hear the laughter and snigger amidst people's conversations. I could feel the energy around but I couldn’t feel any in my body. I stood there trying to figure out why I can’t join the rhythm and let my soul be elevated.
I stood solitary there in a dress mom brought for me, It was a blue dress embellished with delicate linen and lace with a touch of stone and beads of colors.
“Hi Pearl, you came,” Bella said smiling. I smiled back forcefully and nodded. “Aww... I’m so glad. C’mon grab a drink and explore. Let’s merry.” She screamed.. “haha.. I’ll be right back. Just loosen up, will ya?” With that, she disappeared.
In my mind I could hear the inner me say “Really, loosen up in here? You do not belong here, do you? You should have stayed home, and enjoyed the suspense of “the silent patient” by Alex Michaelides, Isn’t this torture?”
As the night progresses, I remained on the periphery, observing how everyone manages to fit in, conversations were flowing, bodies moving to the rhythm as melodies surged. I toppled on the chair next to me, I still couldn’t get my ears off the sound of the clicking of glasses.
☘︎
𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐞𝐧𝐝...
☘︎
Image is mine, thumbnail designed using canva and Gifs are sponsored by tenor.
𝒔𝒆𝒆 𝒚𝒂𝒂𝒂..