My phone rang several times in the office that morning. My office mate had noticed how uneasy and restless I had been all through the day. “Emem, pick your calls na! No disturb me with your ring tone, abeg.” She said this, sounding quite irritated about the way my phone kept ringing. I had to put it on silent to relieve her of the obvious irritation. When she spoke, I said nothing to her. I just gave her a cold look and continued flipping through the pages of the book before me. I was merely flipping through it aimlessly. My mind had travelled very far.
Several hours after I missed the call, I refused to return it, talk more of send a message. It was Isaac. Isaac was the love of my life. He was the perfect answer to the prayer I had prayed all my life. His love and care made up for all the years I had no man in my life. He would check up every morning before I got to work, and would even offer to drive me down to work if he felt I had been too stressed the night before. It wasn't just the sweet personality. He had the perfect height that complimented me, with broad shoulders and a firm build that was irresistible. He was too good, and didn't deserve the silent treatment I gave him, but I had no choice.
On my last birthday before I met Isaac, I almost gave up. The frustration of not having a man to call my own was deep. Beyond the frustration, the pressure from my mother was suffocating. My mother never stopped using the slightest opportunity she had to remind me of the fact that I was a failure. Her own first daughter, still single at 40. Each time she said this, she would begin to shed crocodile tears to make me saturated with guilt. Well, I couldn't get any reasonable man, and the tears were not potent enough to fetch me one, not until Isaac showed up.
Isaac didn't stop calling.What was I supposed to say to him? If at all I tried to pick his calls, he would ask for a physical meeting. How would I face him? I wasn't the type of person strong enough to talk when I was broken inside. I would just begin to tear and cry like a baby, that you would wonder if I were the same tough person who stood before the ladies in the church to tell them with so much authority how much faith they should have in God even in trying moments. Too bad, the super woman whom the church women thought they knew had finally broken down beyond repair.
I was sinking deeply, but could barely speak to anyone about it, not even my beloved Isaac, who had called me several times. I needed Jesus himself to save me from the sinking boat I was in.
“Finally, you get to pick my calls.” He began. “You have ruined me with worry.” “What happened?” “Are you okay?” He asked almost at once. I was silent for a few seconds just to get myself together and give an answer. His voice broke me. He didn't deserve this at all. He deserves someone better, I thought. His soft but firm masculine voice pierced deep into me that I found myself weeping almost immediately. “Babe, what's wrong?” He asked. “I'm in church.” I managed to reply and immediately ended the call. I was certain he would come over to see me in church. He wouldn't hesitate for a second, especially with my sudden tears.
How was I supposed to tell him what was happening to me? Cold air ran through my entire body as the thought of all the doctor had said to me echoed. “No, I can't.” I said to myself. I had waited long to find this one, and I must keep him. How was I to find love again at 41? No way! I made a gentle resolve to come up with a good lie to give Isaac when he eventually visited, and that I did. He came round the church and I made him believe I lost a close friend and was mourning, hence, my inability to pick his calls.
I will let it out. I had told myself as I got dressed in one of my best outfits I had got after my last trip to the UK. What a way to disclose terrible news to a man I loved, by showing up looking all breathtaking. I should have let the sad news I was to break to him serve as the major hit, and not my looks too.
I was to meet him in the cafe opposite my office, and just in time, Isaac showed up. I went in and greeted him with a warm smile. While he tried to ask what I would like to eat, I just let out “I can't have children.” He looked at me with a gaze of shock. Hot tears immediately trickled and I couldn't control it. Isaac’s look appeared like a child that had been left by the road, and was pure hopeless. He said nothing to me. All he said after I dropped the bomb was, “ let's order lunch.”
“We'll talk about this later.” I was taken aback. How was I supposed to eat with such pain in my heart? My heart began to beat so fast that I immediately picked my bag and left him. I didn't care about what he wanted to say. I was gone!
Several months had passed and I tried to move on with my miserable life. This morning, I was craving my all time favourite, Ofada rice, and decided to stop by the Linton Store to get it. I placed my order in no time, and received it and headed home. I was in a hurry to get home and devour my meal. As I stepped out of my car, Isaac was by my door. “We can adopt.” He said immediately he saw me. “ I have thought long and hard, and I'm sure I want this.” My hands shook as I heard his words. I wanted to run back into the car, but he held me and gave me a reassuring hug. That hug melted me and gave me the confidence I needed to continue with him. We drove out together and had a long talk.
A year later, we got married and adopted the prettiest baby ever. My smiles returned, and for once, I believed in happy endings.