The lady pushing the cart through the supermarket, she was beautiful and well built, anyone looking at her would think she didn't belong to this world, no one would believe she was in her mid 40's, she had this classiness to back her up. More than anything she seemed to have a perfect life, a perfect husband, perfect kids and a perfect home but closely looking, one would know she had this sadness eating deep inside her big brown eyes.
"Good evening Mrs Edet, you look stunning as always, let me pack that up for you,"
"Thanks", Lauren replied with a smiled. She picked her grocery filled shopping bag and went to her car. The drive home felt short, this was the worst part of her day, going back home to the lonely huge apartment that was once filled with Joy and laughter, she was greeted by the huge family portrait hanging in the living room, a portrait of the family she had that was now gone, she and her husband sitting at the front while her twin boys stood behind them, they all had big smiles on their faces, she could clearly remember the events that led to this picture and her family making jokes at each other before finally posing for the picture, she was smiling remembering that moment but that didn't stop her hidden sadness from escaping through her eyes as tears.
Her sad happy moment was interrupted by the sound of the doorbell, she got flowers, it was her 25th wedding anniversary, she barely remembered it, it was hell for her on the anniversary the previous year because she was still mourning her family so she tried hard not to remember this year's but her husband even in death remembered it, he had signed up for her to receive flowers on each of their anniversary up to the 25th year, this was the 25th year, the flower contract was ending this year.
She got different species of flowers on each of their anniversary but this time it was a white rose, she took out the note on the flower and read
"Dear Lauren, if you're getting this flower then it's our 25th anniversary, I need you to know that I appreciate every moment we've spent together and the home we've built, I've gotten two flight ticket to Spain and already booked our hotel and I want us to spend some time together alone but if for some reason I'm not around, my lawyer will still plan the trip, I need you to go alone, take some fresh air and start to breathe again. I love you now and always. XO."
Lauren broke into uncontrollable tears, it seemed like somehow she was reliving her nightmares again, the two corpse at the morgue, the boy handing down the the ceiling, it had come flooding back again and for the first time in months she let herself wail her heart out, death could've been an option for her at the moment, she missed her family dearly. She cried herself to sleep that night and her brain feeling she hadn't mourned enough tortured her with the memories of how her life went sour, she had to remember it even when she was asleep.
It was a beautiful Sunday morning and the sun shined bright enough to revive even the dead plants, they had just finished breakfast and her husband John had decided to go get the groceries to fill up the fridge for the week, one of their twin boys Emmanuel had offered to tag along so he could assist his dad. She was sleeping when she got the call, her husband had run into a trailer on the road, both he and their son lost their lives, Lauren had taken consolation in the fact that she had to be strong for their living son Samuel but he got depressed and committed suicide four months after the death of his father and brother.
Lauren had never thought she would survive, she went to bed every night thinking she would die before morning but death never came. She never bothered clearing out her kid's room nor pack up her husband's things, she left them as a shrine to them thinking if she never forgot them they would come back to her but reality soon started to kick in, she clearly understood they were never coming back but even after two years, she couldn't let them go.
Her trip to Spain was lonely but she knew she needed it, she tried her best to not think of her pains on this trip, she had decided just to think of herself and how to go on with life, she often found herself wondering if she could find the freedom she was looking for, the freedom to finally leave all the pains and hurt behind, the freedom of living again. She visited the sacred shrine of the dead, there she sent letters to her dead family, she felt like she got a chance to tell them everything she needed to, she expressed her anger at them for leaving her all alone, then she told them how much she missed them and told them she was finally letting them go, there was no single tear in her eyes this time, she felt relived, her burden had been lifted, she could live again.
After the trip to Spain she finally learnt how to move on while cherishing the memories of her departed family, she cleared out their items and donated to those who needed them, she sold out the apartment where she lived with them and got a new smaller one, her sorrows had not completely ended, she still had the nightmares and felt lonely at night but she knew she wasn't going to waste the life she had left mourning forever, she had learnt to live with the pain.
It was one year later, the morning of her 26th anniversary, she had visited the cemetery where her family rested and kept flowers on each of their tombs, she had gone to church after that. While driving back home from church something caught her attention, it was a kissing booth, this was where she first met her husband, she came down and was about to cross the street when something hit her, it was a car, she was lying on the floor in her own pool of blood, she could see and hear the voices of her family, she smiled and said out,
"I finally got the chance to be here with you all, how much did I long for this moment? You can never tell."
