Few steps is more than a mile for him.
Had I not pushed him to walk in the hospital room, we would have been still there - they don't really bother much for the overall well being, there is no holistic treatment to motivate the patient to bring back to normalcy. So it's all on the shoulder of the attendant and after coming home, I tried to push Dad to walk for few minutes in the corridor.
At home, he feels very comfortable and looks much better and no one can even say that he has any health issue but the moment I tell him to go for a walk, I can see a withdrawal symptom and sadness at his face. It's like he has decided to not walk at all and that thought of walk saddens him.
I tried to use a different method, encouraging and luring him like a kid and telling him, how beautiful he looks when he walks and if he walks he can eat all his favorite non-veg items. Seeing this photo made him happy, but it was only momentary. Next morning, he did not carry that inspiration and refused to step out of the door.
Next evening, I convinced him and took to a nearby shop to buy a walker shoes that he can comfortably wear without anyone's help - these shoes are specially designed so that, you don't have to put your hand. And since they are pretty well cushioned, I thought, he will feel much better while walking and get motivated.
But it does not help a lot because the very thought of walk feels like a burden to him. I have been trying to push a lot, but it needs so much patience - because he does not want to listen at all. Tell him hundred times, and he will still not get up from his place. Force him to get up, he will try to beg to wait for some more time with a sad emotional face. Seeing all these, my boy was saying to me, you have a lot of patience to try all these - boy, we will all go through this phase of life. Who knows, when I get old, may be you will have to do this !!!
Dad is certainly going through a big shift in his sentiment and seeing his sad face when I tell him to walk, made me decide not to push him any more. I don't know what's in store for us, but as it's impossible to know why he is behaving like this, we have decided to be more empathetic and compassionate and not show him our frustration or anger and instead treat him like a kid. I am taking him today to his home, where he may feel more comfortable and inspired but again we don't know. It's literally impossible to walk in Dad's shoes, but we will try our best to bring him peace and joy.
This post is in response to the Creative Nonfiction Prompt #154, I am a little late, but life has been so demanding and restless for last couple of weeks.
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