I have always had this huge crush on Elizabeth Simpson. Botany was a constant failing course for me, semester after semester I just couldn't get better, I could barely pronounce the botanical nomenclature of the plants.
You see the problem wasn't that I lacked interest in the course, neither was professor Judith terrible. The problem was I just couldn't concentrate.
How can i, when this is the only course that brings Elizabeth under same roof as myself.
I finally summoned courage to ask her to be my date for the oncoming valentine season thanks to a lousy bet I had with Chukwudi, my heart pumping harder than the pistons of a Lister generator I managed to say the words. It is funny though how assumptions have ruined too many chances, opportunities never get to happen because Mr A assumes Mr B has everything figured out where as there's a huge gap needing urgent attention. Apparently, she had never been asked out on a date before due to the over protectiveness of her parents, she was always indoors.
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She said yes.
With restaurant reservations made, bank broken beyond repairs (even had to borrow). However, this boy must make a lasting impression that must last longer than Valentine himself.
Oga please come down.
This alcohol reeking Constable was ordering me out of the car, vehicle I practically squeezed the key out of mummy's hands under strict conditions to be met before during and after my date night. So I don't delay my date any further or give this officers a field day with me with the constant news I read about police brutality steadily on social media and the likes, I wasnt going to be a victim
So I alighted.
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Wetin you carry?
(What are you carrying)
Abeg open your boot
(Please open your car trunk)
I tried to tell him I wasn't carrying anything at all not to talk of the possibility of transporting contraband but to no avail, he was adamant.
So I went ahead and opened. I also had to obey many instructions as my plea to them that I was late for an appointment fell on deaf ears. My phone already buzzing continuously, now the the tone sounding tired I think.
I could picture Elizabeth pacing about and growing impatiently restless for fear that I had stood her up. Oh!!! Sweet daughter of Eve, her first date wasn't going as planned. Was this how she'd remember me?
My imagination was returned to planet earth when liquid from the officer's mouth splashed on my face. He was yelling and growing impatient (Apparently everything about me and the car had checked out yet this man just neededed to pen something on me badly).
I am talking to and you're raising shoulders abi?
You're forming big boy, because you're a Yahoo boy.
You think I don't know?
I later got to find out that according to this man's statistics, every Benz owner that falls within the category of 25-40 years old was a fraudster.
I told him the vehicle belonged to my mother but he wouldn't listen. Then we got to the point of extortion and he said he only wanted 10,000 naira to buy a bottle of Pepsi. The sun was too hot and he needed to cool off, and I just happened to be his scape goat.
I made contact with mummy who then called me back on my mobile phone and asked to speak with the uniformed man. I watched as his tone reduced to that of a calm child standing still as he was being scolded. After many Yes sir!!! Sorry Sir he handed my phone back to me and strolled back to his duty post ignoring me without a word.
I was late for my date, Elizabeth had called to cancel, something about an errand for her dad.
With no further destination, I headed back home disappointed.
While on the road, amidst my disappointment questions about what just happened rained in my head.
What did the lawyer say to the drunk constable that could quail and make him abolish his mission?
How do I get that power a lawyer wields?
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So I set out on a journey, the journey TO BECOME A LAWYER.
As lucrative as the occupation is, the incubation period turned out to be quite interesting.
Well, that was 12 years ago. A trip to Ikeja, Lagos state saw me in traffic where I witnessed almost the same situation i had experienced years ago. These brought back memories and I said to myself "If you were a lawyer now, you'd know what to do".
Well I know what to, I'll call my lawyer. And so I did.
Cheers!!!