I
Nordlute strummed his strupaxe. He was a sysadmin for the big blogging platform. His job was to deal with shitposters who plagued it. They would post their shit and exploit the payment system to deprive others of justly earned rewards. This was endlessly frustrating and depressing work, so he would play his strupaxe to de-stress.
Nordlute was named after his father's favourite musical instrument which was used in traditional folk music, but he preferred the strupaxe with its 17 strings of electrified cacophony. It could sound like angels or demons with a flick of the wrist.
Lately a new shitposter had emerged. He was obviously new to it, but had been careful to conceal his identity. His posts just that little bit too good to be considered really shit, but still below what sane people would consider worthy of a 1 saloti vote. He was making far more than that thanks to an army of shitbots.
Nordlute had spent all day trying to track this shitposter down, but after a dinner of microwaved brogwurst and a luke-warm Pixielot beer he needed something to take his mind off work.
He chucked the disposable plate on the fire, downed the rest of his tasteless beer and flicked the switch.
Nordlute strummed his strupaxe.
Nordlute, the shit sysadmin is a serial shitposting fiction inspired by Torundel the shitposter by 
Rules are:
211 words - Starting with the words "Nordlute" - First and last sentence are identical.
