Before I got married, there were certain things I did for the relationships I was into, sometimes I will be the one to fill in the loop all by myself and will only sink without getting a reciprocating help from my partner, so let me tell you how my last relationship ended and the lessons I learnt.
So I met Victor who was from my state - Imo State, I met him while I was still serving as a chef for one of my Chinese boss back then, he was a business partner to my boss, so charming at first and every word spoken by him was filled with so much love and butterflies, immediately he asked me out ,I didn't waste any time and I accepted him.
The first three months were all rosy and I was thinking I had arrived and alas I was done with all the heartbreaks as Victor showed me nothing short of love, he would call at midnight and would want to hear just my voice before he would be able to sleep, to me things like these were strange to me because I have never seen someone so intentional about my relationship with them.
Months passed and Victor's love began to go on decline, I was very fast to notice but did not get to worry about it as I was thinking it was because he lost a deal he so much invested things into not knowing Victor wasn't who exactly I thought he was. I was out here consoling him, sending him gifts just to cheer him up and he was still giving me cold shoulder.
One night, I visited him unaware to him only to meet kids and a woman in her early 40s I guessed ,I thought they were his distant relation he has always been on call with every now and then, it was when I went inside that he pushed me outside again and asked me to tell the woman that I am his laundry person, this was when it dawned on me these people were his own family.
I obliged even when I was very furious, I know you would question why I did so but then this was someone family I wouldn't let my immediate emotions destroy, the woman was innocent so why should I cause her pains? I told her I came to pack clothes to the shop to wash and then he (Victor) handed me some clothes and I took to my place.
Just for the wife to believe, I gave laundry guy the clothes to wash and paid for them then send the clothes through a dispatch rider to deliver it to them at home and the wife was there. Victor tried reaching out to me, I would see the miss calls and would never pick, he apologized with everything on earth but I was so done, for a while my conscience was hitting me so hard, I was seeing those beautiful souls and wish I never betrayed them.
After a while I got healed and was so happy I ddnt tell the wife what transpired between myself and his dear husband. I only pray God helped me change him because why on earth would someone lie that much? The beautiful thing was his family and why would he do such to them.
Above all I learnt that no matter how good people appear to be, there are certain things that still flaw them. Also the things that happens to us are just 10% and how we react to the situation is 90%. The guilt left because I was ignorant of who Victor was and I shouldn't die blaming myself for someone's carelessness.