What is actually called ngeyel, at first I did not understand, and I am the most interesting person. Funny people are people who feel themselves right, so that when someone tells something for example why is the appointment late? or why doing their work is not in accordance with the instructions, they always defend themselves that their actions are right. The ultimate goal is not to be blamed.
I tried to remember why I was like that, as I recall when someone else started blaming what I was doing, I started looking for reasons that what I was doing was right. Because I always want to be right, as a result, I have never studied, I have never been able to improve myself, and my life has become stagnant with no progress. What really happened, why do people who are interested in their lives? Improving living standards begins with ways of thinking like people who are financially successful. Why can they succeed financially? Yes, the way of thinking is different. So to get a successful life, you must be able to learn so that you can think like the person you want to expect.
And if you become a person who is jealous, he feels he already knows, and does not want to be blamed, then he cannot absorb the knowledge of others. The point that goes against the way he thinks is wrong. My mentor once told me, there are some people who say that he is not good, but financially he is a very successful person, and far more successful than us, we can also live his life. So no matter how bad the person is, so the way of thinking must be good. (It needs to be distinguished by someone who is financially successful, but how to get that success. Of course what I mean here is not the person who gets success with cheating).
What causes me to change? Initially because of my senior role, I was asked to start reading books, and from that moment on I read books. Then every time I attended the seminar I was told to write, and the last time I was told and told I began to be reprimanded. And once I was reprimanded I began to realize. Since that time, I have never stopped talking. When I was asked to read a book, there were many things I learned from self-development books, from the selection of positive words to speaking, eliminating complaining words. From reading books and changing the way I choose words to speak, I have started to think positively, so that when I am reprimanded, I can already receive.
From that time on I always wanted to listen to other people speak, regardless of what was said I agreed or not, if I did not agree, I usually ask. With questions, I will understand what my interlocutors think. If I had a debate, then I didn't learn anything.
To change yourself from ngeyel to accepting other people's opinions, requires a third party that can change the way we think, maybe many people experience this change. Of course you have different experiences of how a person can change. What is certain is that changes can occur due to third parties.