Do you meditate at all? It sounds like you are swinging hard into the depths of the rabbit hole only to turn around and then gasp for air back at the surface. A bit of mindfulness might help slow you down and stabilise your mental state a little bit.

Don't give up on the red pill. We need people like you getting the critical thoughts firing and your blog is generally pretty awesome at thought provocation....but don't overdose on that red pill because it can be very unhealthy to be so edgy all the time.

PS - The recent QAnon "no-show" really just confirms more in my mind that they are a red herring. Perhaps designed to lead us down a false garden path that will fatigue us from disappointment and false promise that will end in our resignation away from seeking those elusive truths.