Who am I?

What am I?

When people report experiences of ego-death, it is usually in connection with psychedelic substances or transcendent states, during meditation for example. An experience in which the ego completely dissolves. A state without a sense of I.

It became my habit to reach this kind of state every day, even if only for a few seconds.

But why would you want to do that?

Lao Tse, Chinese philosopher and founder of Taoism, would possibly answer this question as follows:

"The reason why I suffer great suffering,
is just my awareness of self.
If I give up my awareness of self,
what harm can come to me then?

(Tao Te King, Laotse, Verse 13)

What is this awareness of self - this ego - anyway?

It is a thought construct, consisting of information stored in our neural network called the brain, in the form of visual (vision), auditory (hearing), tactile (touch), gustatory (taste) and olfactory (smell) impressions. You could also simply call it memories. A story of coherent events in our head. Bound with all kinds of emotional energy.

The information from the body itself is what I leave out at this point. Things like self-preservation and the sex drive, to name two examples.

The ego is an identification with thoughts, our individual history.
For most of us - and I do not exclude myself - this thought construct represents a prison.
Why is it so? Because it defines the perception and experience of our environment, and this in turn determines our actions and behavior.

If you keep this in mind, you will soon realize that free will is a very elastic concept.

The psychoanalyst Carl Gustav Jung had written the following after the confrontations with his own ego:

"I have realized that what I had previously called my soul,
is not my soul at all, but a dead schoolhouse...
... an edifice of so-called experiences and judgments.

(The Red Book, Carl Gustav Jung)

This special thought construct of the ego, which is associated in neuroscientific circles with the so-called default mode network (DMN), can sometimes be temporarily disrupted by the following:

• Mindfulness exercises.
  This is exclusively about perceiving impressions. For example the feeling of the lifting chest and belly while breathing in and out, the observing of an object, the listening to music, the smell of forest air or the taste of delicious food. All without the aid of thought.
  --
  I highly recommend mindfulness exercises by Eckhart Tolle and Sam Harris.
  --
  Tip: If thoughts arise, then simply observe them. Do not return thoughts with thoughts, but with perception.

• Transcendental meditation.
  This is a mantra meditation. The mantra is a word, at best one with which one cannot make any mental connection, to not evoke any associations. This mantra is repeated in the mind over and over again. This repetitive chanting of the word causes other conscious mental activities to shut down. As a result, the default-mode network temporarily collapses.
  --
  TM is a very simple, but extremely effective way of meditation!
  --
  You can find a very good tutorial on Youtube under the following link

• Psychedelic substances.
  These include psychedelics such as DMT (N,N-dimethyltryptamine), LSD (lysergic acid diethylamide) and magic mushrooms (psilocybin). Depending on the dosage, these substances can force the DMN to collapse. This often leads to anxiety and panic attacks among those affected. The attempt to resist the process is often named as the trigger for a so-called "bad trip".
  --
  Note: I would like to make it clear, that I do not promote the use of psychedelic substances in any way. The use of psychedelic substances can be very dangerous.

You can find a detailed article on these topics under the following link.

Again, what's the point?

To break your own boundaries!

To take a step back. To free yourself from the tangle of psychological thought constructs. To realize that the reason we suffer great suffering is precisely our awareness of self - the ego.

"Well beyond your window there is so much more. Even every Prison has an open door."

(Billy Talent - Saint Veronica)

Think how many worries would disappear into nothing, if it were irrelevant, from that moment on, what other people might think about you. How much pressure would fall off of your shoulders?

Conclusion

This article is not intended to provide answers according to the motto: problem-response-solution; rather, it is intended to stimulate reflection. Perhaps even raise more questions.

Who or what is aware that the ego has dissolved?

What is the so-called reality?

Let me know what you think of my first post! I‘m looking forward to your feedback

The Psychomist