Just close your eyes for 10 seconds and tell if your childhood days were golden days or like scary dreams. If you feel inferior in society, if you find it difficult to trust other people, or if you do not feel happy even on a happy occasion, or if you get good gradesŲlater other people praise you but you feel that you have not done a commendable job or when you were a student to ask a question in class or even knowing the answer to a question. If you could not raise your hand to answer, then you may find the answers to all these things in this post.
Childhood plays a very important role in shaping the personality of any human being. The mind of every child who comes into the world is like a blank sheet of paper, the way it is treated becomes an indelible imprint in his mind.
The environment in which he grows up also adapts his temperament to this environment.
If you or any of the people around you have a personality disorder, it is most likely due to a bad childhood.
This post mentions the mistakes of parents that they make intentionally or unintentionally and how these mistakes affect the personality of the children and don't leave them all of life.
There are a few things that seem normal to parents but become lifelong cancers for children,and instead of being a useful member of society, they feel a burden to others and to themselves.
Parents never be happy with their children
It is said that our best friends in childhood are our parents but most parents are very strict with their children in view of their good education and training. No matter how well the children perform, the parents demand Do more instead of being happy.In this way, children gradually begin to realize that no matter how hard they try, they will never be good enough.
In addition, some parents are strict in everything from getting up and sitting down, due to which there is no mental harmony between parents and children as they grow up and often children seek support in the outside home to feel good about themselves. And it continues to grow.
Making fun of children
Most of the parents keep on mocking their own children. They not only assume in their heart that their children are useless but also keep on saying in the front of their children that you are not worthy. Even if children do a good job, they still make fun of them instead of encouraging them.
Beating children
Most of us have had our parents beaten, but perhaps out of embarrassment we don't mention it. Many parents brutally beat their children over small things and mischief and as a result of this beating not only stubbornness and extremism become part of the personality of the children but also the children become accustomed to daily beatings,and it seems normal to them.
It seems easier to bear the beating of children easily than to change oneself because of the wrong approach of the parents.
When such children grow up, they do not have the slightest emotional attachment to their parents.
criticizing for no reason
When you are young, your heart will also want our parents to encourage us on small things, we will receive congratulations from them for good results or good performance in sports.But when the expected response to good deeds is not received, children find all their deeds meaningless. On the other hand, as soon as children make a mistake, most of the parents beating them.Parents consider their good deeds to be normal or part of the routine or do not feel the need to praise, but look at the small mistakes of the children and consider it their duty to criticize them.
Hearing unwarranted criticism from parents in every task makes children feel that they are not capable of doing any work properly. Because of such behavior, children become distrustful and even when they grow up, they do not consider themselves to be in competition with others. As such children do not raise their hands in class to do any work, they are always thinking that something will go wrong with them because from childhood they are taught that whatever they do is never perfect.
Comparing your children to other children
Most children are good at curricular activities, some children do well in extracurricular activities, some children are more inclined towards science, some children are more interested in arts, but you will go through this bitter experience when your Parents discourage you from your desires by giving you examples of other children.
In most homes, even siblings, there is such an atmosphere of competition that often when all the family members are together, the worthy child is being praised and the weak child listens to everything in silence and judges himself. That there is something wrong with it compared to others. Even the physical beauty of children is compared. In front of relatives or other people it is said that the eyes of this child are more lovely or the hair of this child is not thick.
If you have children in your home, you may have observed that even very young children understand the concept of being cute and not being cute. They want to hear that they are loved by other children and their clothes are better by other children.
When parents compare their children to each other, the effect is usually twofold. Children either feel jealous of others or feel inferior. If children become jealous, they fight with others and they are more interested in destructive activities instead of confronting them Positively and if the feelings of inferiority get worse then not only their performance is affected but also they get involved in many problems related to inferiority complex.
Facing bullying at school and not taking it serious by parents
Many of you may have experienced bullying at school, meaning that older boys often bully younger ones, eat their lunch and beating them, or make fun of them. Which is why most children find going to school a nightmare.And when children mention bullying to parents, parents declare it as an excuse not to go to school and run away from school, which makes the child insecure even at home.
inequality between boys and girls
Many people consider girls less than boys. For example, a boy will eat fresh bread and if there is stale bread in the house, it is not a problem for a girl to eat it.
No matter what the brother does, the sisters are confined to one circle. Here, since the brother is a boy, the sister has no competition with the brother. Boys are always preferred over sisters at home,doing so does not build confidence in girls.
She is so afraid of femininity that she cannot use her abilities or speak out against oppression.And the effect is that the girls start looking for ways to rebel at an early age and as soon as they find a way in the form of so-called love, they rely on it and ruin their lives.
Parental quarrels, violence, or the loss of a loved one
Children save their parents fighting, abusing, torturing their parents, making accusations and separating their parents in their mind. Similarly, if one of the parents commits a cruel act or dies due to drug addiction, the child will be badly affected.
Fighting between parents, abusing, torturing parents, making accusations and separation of parents etc. are imprinted in the mind of the child. Similarly, if one of the parents commits a cruel act or dies due to drug addiction, the child will be badly affected.
The children of such people grow up and engage in similar activities and in many cases the children treat each other at some point in life as they have seen their parents do.
Because such people do not have a good example to follow and if such people are illiterate, unaware then their married life is of the same quality as their parents and this cycle of ignorance Continues.
Thanks for reading,
Stay safe and healthy.
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