Mum would always say something when we discuss life and serious matters... I have suffered all the difficult times my children will have to suffer, only enjoyment are left for my children. These words whenever she say them to me, I feel some kind of relief and grateful that she's my mum. Even though it isn't possible to be totally free if difficult times, I'm very sure I've had more smooth days than difficult times.
That thought alone helps me to through my difficult times more easily.
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One thing my mum hates is complaining, she hates it so much that I've gotten the habit to be very mindful of how I relate a problem or issue to her just so I could get her advice in peace π you don't want to get her starting from "Stop complaining, it won't change a thing about your situation" because it's definitely going to take more time than the main advice you're looking for or would help you sort out your problems.
While writing this, I'm smiling because I'm realising once again that mum is my go-to person when I'm in my difficult, when I have to think out a solution to a problem or when I'm finding it hard to make a decision that would bring a lot of changes to my life. In most cases, I run to her because she's a perfect role model to emulate in coping with difficult times.
Just as I have learnt, here are a few ways I overcome difficult times.
- Practice Acceptance
Complaining had been what I do first when I'm finding it difficult to get past a stage, like when I had exams back then. I'd complain about how other past students have failed the course and I'd be scared that it could be same with my own. I became less scared when I figured it all goes down to more preparation and being confident about what I know. I stopped complaining and I accept my reality and face it as it comes. It's not an easy choice but it has taught me so much than I would have thought it'd do.
Accepting that I have to face a situation, accepting that I must go through that road, accepting that it's only going to last for a moment... All that acceptance has helped me overcome.
- Stay Prayerful/Grateful
I can't say I'm the most prayerful or grateful but when I'm faced with hard situations, I find myself praying countless times in my heart. I don't voice it out since I am the only one who knows exactly how it is hard for me. I just say my prayers even if it is just a sentence but filled with what I'm faced with. And I begin to count my blessings one after the other. I'll be like "So long I'm breathing, it shall pass" and I find myself smiling when many would expect that I'd cry to what I'm faced with.
- Ask for support
Like I've said, I go to my mum when I'm faced with a puzzle life has offered but she isn't the one I go to meet. I've learnt not to keep to myself as it makes it more difficult for me to overcome. The fact that I'm aware someone knows what I'm faced with and is praying or wishing me well, that simple thought keeps me going through it. Of course, I'm mindful of who I talk to or ask for support from because I've also learnt that all aren't same with how they handle matters shared with them.
- Do what I love to do and have fun
Oh how I love doing what I love more when I'm at a crossroad with life's difficulties. I'll be like "This can't be it, it will go away so why should I stay gloomy and cry over it?" and with that, you'd see me singing, dancing awkwardly or taking walks to visit friends as if nothing is happening that needs my attention (I mean my worries).
With every difficulty I'm faced with, I learn something new either from the situation itself or the people I talk to about it or from the result of that situation... It's all about learning something new from my difficult times.
