Everyone need people in their lives, no matter how much they claim to enjoy being alone. Just like the prompt says even the most independent person wants someone who gets them.
But let’s be very frank here, not every friendship fits. Some friendships drain you. Some confuse you. Some even make you question yourself and your abilities. That’s why I have learned to be more intentional about who I let close. I don’t keep friends just because we have known each other for years because to me time doesn’t always mean connection. For me, friendship has to align with my belief system and my values. It has to support my growth, and not slow it down.
A real friend doesn’t have to be perfect, (after all there is no perfect man🥲) but they should challenge you in a good way. I believe that friendship should make me want to be better, not bitter or full of regrets. I love when a friend pushes me to stay true to my dreams or reminds me of who I am when I start doubting myself. Since I want all of this, I try to also be what I want according to the saying "Treat others the way you want to be treated."
I have met people who seem fun at first, but after a while, I realize we are not heading in the same direction. They talk about things I don’t find healthy. They make choices that don’t sit well with me. A few years ago, I had a friend I was really close to. We did almost everything together; movies, calls, late-night gist sessions, all of it. But as time went on, I started feeling uneasy. I noticed I couldn’t fully be myself around him anymore. Our values began to clash. He would say things that didn’t sit right with me, and his choices started to pull me in a direction I didn’t want to go.
I tried to ignore it at first, and I told myself, “It’s just a phase after all we’ve been friends for so long.” But within me, I knew I was changing.🥲 to cut it short, our paths no longer aligned and we drifted apart.I cared enough about my peace and growth to step back.
And then from my experience, I could say that friendship should align with your belief system and your values. It should support your growth, not drain it. A true friend doesn’t have to agree with you on everything, but they should respect what you stand for. They should challenge you to be better, not push you to compromise who you are.
These days, I choose my circle more intentionally. I look for people who add value, people who believe in kindness, purpose, and growth and I ove friends who can correct me in love, pray with me, and encourages me.So friendship for me is like choosing your environment. Who you walk with influences how you think and what you believe that's why I choose friends who help me grow emotionally, mentally, spiritually and financially (odikwa very necessary😄)
And no, I don’t have a long list of rules. Just one simple thing: we must align in what we believe and where we are headed. Because true friendship should make your light shine brighter and not dim it.
