Love is a beautiful thing... This love na for you and me... This is supposed to be the love story between Somkele and her beloved husband.
We are Africans and we were not really raised to believe in the one man one wife type of marriage institution.
The changes that happen after marriage ceremonies makes me really wonder if there was love to begin with in some marriages.
Somkele met her husband when she was nineteen and she didn't really have much say in who she wanted her husband to be. He was a learned man and he was ten years older than her. She had just finished secondary school and he was a University graduate. He needed a wife from a respectable background and his best friend had recommended her family.
He went with his family to make his intention known and the family agreed to get them married on an auspicious day in February of a year in the 90's.
The traditional wedding rites were done and the wedding happened, in his absence; he had to go back for his masters education in Germany. After the wedding, her papers were done and she was shipped to him in Germany.
They started a humble life, they did not necessarily love eachother but there was respect between both of them.
She began her university processing as well and because she was exceptionally brilliant, she was granted a scholarship.
She got pregnant with their first child and he seemed to be elated until sometime in her second trimester, he took her to a hospital and she was given an injection that would layer cause complications in the birth of that child.
After her third trimester, she gave birth to a child whose organs were damaged and had to get a blood transfusion, all to no avail. The baby died.
She came back to stay in Nigeria to recover from the shock of losing a baby in such a horrible way.
After about two years, she went back to her husband and things did not remain the same.
Her husband became extremely jealous for the smallest things, he was now done with his masters and he wanted to go back home. To save her marriage, she forfeited her scholarship and followed him.
She did not further her education and he always took the chance to insult her for not going to school.
They've been married for over 30 years now and not once would she say she has been happy in her marriage.
He went on to marry three more women.