As I've been browsing on my social media, I've seen a post of a parent posting their child's grades.And of course you guess it right.The kid has a pretty high grades.It is something "worth" posting.
But to be honest, I never felt happy seeing it.Instead, It left me with questions.Why Post it? (I can hear your answers as I am writing this).And that they are basically just proud.
Although this question is also brought up by the fact that I know them personally and I never heard an appease for the kid's flaws.Even a celebration for a kids mistake. I only heard their proud remarks about their kid's achievement.Its also evident that there is hidden competition with the kid and his sibling.
For me it is a peculiar thing, I see a different pattern from it.Its simply put like this: I am proud of you, only because of your achievements not because of you as my child.Adults has to be careful on the way they push on the cues to their child's mind.Because kids register on it.They are pure and they might see the pattern more clearly than us.Adopt on it thinking that it was the right thing to do.
It will brought a jab right into the child's self-esteem.They will have this notion that they are worthy only when they achieved something.When in fact they are worthy, no questions asked.We are talking about kids but kids do grow up and become an adult one way or another. What will be the like of it if he grew up without healing that part of him?
Of course, he's gonna look for validation outside of himself.He's gonna be superficial.Newsflash the parent just developed a narcissistic behavior in their child.
For you to understand this, watch the video specifically at 8:10 part of the video where it is explained by a professional on how a parenting can result to narcissism in their child.
For further knowledge about narcissism and the different kinds of it,I dropped this video right here
Now I wanted to end this post with something positive, It would be a shame not to share this with you.As I usually say when it comes to unconditional love, set the person free.Allow them to make mistake and learn from it, It is our job to give them the assurance that you are still there for them no matter what.
In the incoming videos below you will see how important to acknowledge emotions specially in kids.How important it is to love and understand them even if something or everything is not going alright.How lovely it is to develop empathy in kids.We should never underestimate how they think about things and even us as adults can learn from them too.(P.S. Grab a tissue first before watching the videos below)
For further knowledge, This is an experiment made for the oldies in the show who are living their life alone.Some were diagnosed of depression and frailness but after the show, they got better.I suggest you watch the other videos too.It is worth it.