At the beginning of this year, I never wanted to just jump into a relationship without taking my time to study my supposed partner, not after previous heartbreaks I have experienced. Sometimes, I just want to remain single for a while so I can enjoy the fun and have peace of mind that comes with it, not crying over a guy because he refused to pick up my calls, not give me what I wanted or raising my mind high with cheating and what have you.
But late in March, I came across a guy who I thought was mature enough to handle a relationship but was not. I decided to give him a chance but to begin first as friends, then watch and study him to see if truly he is worth spending my time with.
The friendship was going fine and I never asked for anything from him. I saw myself as being enough to take care of myself and do not need a guy's money to do that. I am someone who doesn't ask for money from a guy even in my past relationships, some of my friends would say it's okay to ask even if I have which I see some sense in it, lol. But I just wanted to give this guy time before asking for anything.
One of my goals this year is to keep my distance away from relationships until I have seen the correct man who is mature and responsible. You know, sometimes, you don't know someone from afar until they move closer to you. I decided to test this guy out.
A red flag was pointed at me on our first meeting but I ignored it thinking he was trying to test me. He met with me after service in the church (he is also a member and belongs to the instrumentalist team playing the guitar for the church) the next thing was for him to ask me to buy pure water for him. I went to get what to drink that afternoon and when he asked such a question, I got confused at first and looked him through his dress from head to toe before I agreed. In my mind, I was like, "This little amount is nothing" so I waved it off. I know he must have thought in his mind why I did such skeletal scrutiny 😄, we talked for some minutes and he asked for my number afterwards which I gave him.
That was how the friendship started. You know what, this guy was bluffing and running his mouth when we met the second time and I was just looking at him while smiling because of how he was already selling himself to be a talkative and one with a sweet mouth. I wasn't surprised for a guy like him to keep running his mouth nonstop and if I could remember, I only said a few words to him and that was it. He was talkative and one who bluffs unnecessarily but he never knew I was holding those words in my hand in case he said something else next time of which I would catch him red-handed.
The friendship went on for a month and a half, I then decided to ask him for money just to test him especially since he would always show up at my house to eat and not bring something while coming. I know he wasn't the right guy but I decided to tag along to have lots of experiences to share with my friends, hahaha.
I was playing along and he, on the other hand, was claiming to love me, blablabla. I threw a big question at him one day what was his plan and ambition for the future, I was shocked to hear him say he doesn't plan for the future because he does not know when he will die. WTF! Was that coming from a guy who wanted a relationship with Princess? Nah. This one cannot take care of me. How much does he even have in his account? Don't get me wrong, I am not after a guy's money but I wouldn't want to end up with a guy who doesn't have a future nor does he have what it takes to care for a woman.
Whenever I asked him for money, he would give the excuse that I have enough and also financially capable than him which I would tell him it doesn't mean. He would always come around to visit me and the caring girl I am would give him food, of course, I am hospitable. How does a guy come over to a lady's house and all he ever wants is food and to sleep? So crazy but I kept watching him until he crossed the line by asking me to give him a huge amount of money and when I refused him, he stopped texting or calling me for over a week.
I didn't bother to call him too because I knew it was time to send him away as he wasn't someone that should be in my life plus he wasn't ready to know what financial stability is. Imagine asking him if he ever saves and all he could say was that he doesn't save as he only believes in a lavish lifestyle. Lavish lifestyle for someone who isn't able to feed himself? 😃
I told my best friend about him and she said he is a gold digger who is after my money because I have made him know what I am capable of. She advised that I don't show off to guys instantly which I never did in the first place. I was only living my life the normal way I should and I guessed he saw that in me and decided to play a smart one on me.
After over a week, he showed up at my house uninvited and unexpectedly, I couldn't believe he could come around and he still couldn't give any reason for not calling. I didn't give him any attention as I was focused on what I was doing at that moment, after a few minutes of not saying anything, he stood up and said he was going, I said okay and that was it. I was just shocked as to how a guy who claims to be mature couldn't convince a lady and apologised. I had to text him afterwards and gave him my piece of mind quitting the so-called friendship, and all he, after reading it, could say was "Hmm. Okay" 😃 I think he is still a child.
Thank God I let him go with my words. Even though he still calls me every once in a while, trying to bring me back. But it is over. I don't want a nuisance in my life, one who behaves like a child and who cannot handle a relationship.
